I hesitated briefly, just a blink of an eye because I had no time to calculate my shot, no time to study the wind speed or select a particular bullet.
One blink was all I had to regulate my breathing.A single misstep in my breath could have sent the bullet toward Mila instead.
That late reaction was when Dom stabbed Mila. One blink, and I could have saved her from that pain.
I had the power to stop it, but I let the opportunity slip away.
I failed.
Yeah, I got Dom in the end, but…there was so much blood coming out of Mila’s stomach it overshadowed Dom’s death.
A deathly hue washed over Mila’s skin, a shade so pale only death would find it captivating. Lips of sallow pink against pale blue.
Every time I close my eyes, I see her face like that. Not the feisty little fox I met so long ago.
“You need to talk to her.”
“Oh, you and I both know that’s not a good idea.” I snort sinisterly. Entering the car, I settle into the driver’s seat.
“You’re making it worse.”
The engine roars to life. I grip the wheel and declare,“Or better.” Looking ahead, I spot Damian’s car pulled off to the side of the road.
Talking got me into this mess. I made a deal with Mila, then kissed her. I should have ignored her and my father’s request. Talking does nothing but provoke; fortune can smile upon you, or it can leave you broke. You never know.
“You’re an ass.” Damian hits the car window.
Grinning, I say,“I’ll see you tonight.” Then I speed off, leaving the scent of burning tires to fill his nose.
The only thing that keeps me focused is the fight ring Titan, Damian, and I joined. The same individuals from The Cleansing are involved, but this time, there’s no demand for death. An hour from Empire University lies a town where students escape to play the part of ordinary, rich kids, indulging in clubbing and partying. But underneath that nightclub is where those of us who can’t escape choose to fight instead.
Each weekend, I bash my knuckles till they crack and bleed, longing for the pain to touch my heart. The only thing I’m good at is piling more guilt into that dead organ that beats with no mission. It just thumps a burdensome reminder that I’m stillalive, suffering, seeing Mila and my memories every goddamn day.
Chapter 19
Mila
Scars are like icebergs; at first glance, you only see the shape above the water. It’s always interesting or grotesque enough to capture people’s attention at first glance.
No one usually looks deeper; they don’t dive under those uncharted waters because fear of the unknown holds them back; it seals their heels to the floor or twists their spines so they don’t have to look at the waves hiding the lurking monsters beneath them. Memories, just under the scar’s surface, begging to be set free, but no one is ever brave enough to ask, so those nightmares stay hidden under the scars, using that thick callus skin as a camouflage.
I feel the memories hiding now, just beneath my flesh, under that ugly red scar Dom carved into my skin. Forever lurking. Hunting. Squirming and shuffling, slithering and tiptoeing, trying to worm their way up from my scar into my mind.
Some nights, I feel him inside of me; instead of faking that I enjoy it, I show him my true feelings. He doesn’t stop.
Why would he?
He was a demon wrapped in flesh, stinking with charm; I fell for it all, allowing him to lure me in so he could take everything from me.
He wanted my last breath, and the only reason he didn’t claim it was because of Dash King. My other monster who wants more from me yet so much less at the same time.
Calm down. That’s it; take a deep breath.
Stop. Don’t dig your nail into the palm of your hand. There, that’s it. Hold the handle of your luggage instead.
This bag feels like a fishing hook, and I’m the bait being cast into a sea of sharks.
While recovering at home for the last two months, I caught up on school assignments and spent quality time with my dad. It’s the longest duration we have ever spent together. Some nights, we had nothing to say, and others, it was too much to bear.