Page 149 of Ink Deep Devotion

“So this is how it will be. You’ll come to me to vent and fuck and then leave.” Good. I sound vicious and do not feel like I’m wallowing in sorrow.

Sharp eyes stab me. The light finally reaches his glare.

I wish it didn’t.

Cold blue with flecks of hazel. A violent mixture of numbing cold and molten fire.

I straighten my spine.“The truth hurts, Dash.”

Rather than an automated response, he resumes picking at his nails.Thud, thud!He loudly kicks each leg out, getting more relaxed.“Titan bears the real burden. He gets the ruling seat since he is the eldest. Damian and I just get to help him maintain power.”

“Does that bother you?”

He moves slowly, making my inhale stretch the span of some lifetimes. He scrutinizes his hands, focusing on his nails under the weak light as though he’s just gotten a professional manicure.

I know better. I used to see the same dirt and grime—the invisible marks that can’t be removed, washed off, or covered up. They linger longer than a tattoo that fades over time.

“It makes me feel relieved.” He answers.“And jealous.”

I push my tongue to the roof of my mouth, but I can’t stop my reply.“Because you want more power?”

“No.” An answer so firm it’s indestructible, like time, and it’s going to keep moving forward whether you like it or not.“I don’t want Titan to suffer the weight of a crown. I wish I could take it from him.”

The devil is noble, after all.“You keep putting others wants before your needs. You want me safe and sound because you love me, so you lock me away, but that will be our undoing. In the end, you’re what destroyed us. You want Titan unchained, so you’re willing to find the key and undo his chains only to bind yourself in the iron. When will you take whatyouneed, Dash?”

When would you have loved me?

“Wants and needs don’t matter if the people you live for are dead.”

“But we’re alive, and you’re pushing us away.” I drop the sheet, letting him see my bleeding heart.

“I didn’t come here to argue.”

“So why did you come?”

The thud of his head hitting the wall makes me jerk.“I came to talk. You’re the only person I can show my pain to. Titan will try to avenge me. Damian will suffer alongside me.”

I abruptly turn my head.“Okay, I’m listening,” I reply. I can separate my feelings for a moment. In front of me is a person who is suffering. Yes, he’s hurt others, but I want to understand why so I can try to fix him. I will try to help him sort out his emotions until the day Avery takes me away, but I will not change my mind. I am running.

He runs a hand through his hair.“I hated my father. Now he’s dead, and I realize that the definition of hate changes depending on who it is attached to.”

I brace myself. Dash hadn’t uttered a word to me about his father’s death. No emotions. Nothing.He made a wall to protect himself. Now I get to see inside.

“I hate cotton candy flavored ice cream; I hate Nova and the man we have chained downstairs. Sometimes I hate you.” The lingering scent of laundry detergent mixed with his scent on the sheets makes it feel like we’re sitting toe to toe.“I hated my father, but each of you holds a different meaning of hate in my mind.”

“Maybe hate isn’t what you feel.”

“It is.” He snaps.

“It’s okay to forgive someone.”I hope you forgive me.

“Forgiveness makes you weak; it makes your enemies think they can walk all over you.”

“Why is everyone your enemy? You forgive Titan and Damian. Not everyone is out to get you, Dash. Forgiving a friend or a loved one isn’t a weakness. It can be a sign of strength. Sometimes, it’s better to fix a problem rather than start over. Rebuilding is costly.”

“Depends what the cost is.” He rebuttals.“The option might cost you your life.”

“Some risks are worth the reward.” I bite.

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