Page 116 of As The Shifter World Turns

I walked back to my car. I needed to let my stag out, to stretch my legs. It’s what I should’ve done instead of taking a walk. I always felt better when I let my beast out.

Climbing into the driver’s seat I saw it for the first time. Seb hit me good, my eye was already swelling and blackening. Just another reason to go shift.

I drove to Daire’s parents’ land. They might be shitty people, but they had figured something out with Daire or he wouldn’t still own Sunshine Manor and as much as they were snobby jerks, they’d never taken away the sanctuary that allowed us to be in our fur.

Didn’t make me like them, but I did respect that about them.

I parked the car and tore off my clothes, needing to get out of my skin. Of course my urgency made it take twice as long as it should’ve.

I called my stag forward and bolted through the clearing. I ran until I found myself face to face with a wolf.

Not just any wolf.

It was Ivor.

43

SEEDS OF DOUBT

Ivor

My wolf didn’t carry my human emotions with him when we shifted. Him being confronted by Ryder in stag form was an opportunity to play, to run and chase one another in the woods, a game both wolf and stag had played frequently when we’d shifted together.

If Ryder’s beast wanted to eat, my wolf would leave him alone. Nibbling on grass and berries wasn’t his thing. He’d take down a rabbit or two and wait until the stag had finished grazing.

My beast bounded through the trees, weaving in and out and the stag’s hooves thundered on the ground behind. Crouching low behind rocks, he leapt out as the stag galloped past, causing Ryder’s beast to rear up on his hind legs.

His was a cunning beast and he lowered his head, pinning my wolf to the ground with his antlers, the tips embedded in the earth a hair’s breadth from my beast’s fur. Both animals were panting and when he released my wolf, he sprinted back to the van.

Taking back my own skin, I studied Ryder’s stag. Moonlight touched the tip of his magnificent antlers as he lifted his head to the sky. Noble was the word that popped into my head. He could be a king. His lean body and wary gaze were signs that if he were a wild stag, he’d live alone, content to roam the woodlands and forest, occasionally coming in contact with groups of deer.

Except that was a dream—a fantasy—and he wasn’t any of those things. Ryder was a man and a deeply flawed one as all shifters and humans were. He was a lying, cheating, Kellan-loving, baby-making stag shifter who had his own business and lived in 2A. Fuck him!

And then he shifted and I caught a glimpse of the face I loved. I’d tried to stop loving him, but I couldn't. Instead, I let anger and rage fill me, and that was what drove me this last week. It wasn’t healthy, as Neil had told me, but it got me up in the morning and through the day.

But the face staring back at me had a black eye. I’d heard but not seen Ryder being punched.Don’t feel sorry for him. He deserved it.

“Ivor.” His voice brought me back to the present. One where I was naked and my clothes were near the van. Being naked around shifters wasn’t a big deal. And Ryder had been inside me, fucked me senseless and sucked my cock, but now, I needed to find my jeans and shirt and cover myself up. Being naked with another person was a sign of familiarity and I couldn’t stand to be around him, let alone look at him.

We were the first ones back. Archer’s wolf and Micah’s unicorn were off doing their own thing, Daire’s grizzly was in the lake and Martin’s fox was doing whatever foxes did. I could hide in the van. Lock myself in. Ryder might stand outside and shout or beat on the door but hopefully he’d take the hint and go home. His car must be here somewhere.

“Ivor!” I ignored him and stalked to where my clothes were strewn over the ground. I’d been so desperate earlier to get rid of my skin and give my beast his fur, I’d tossed them off where I stood. Shifting and giving my wolf his head, allowed me to forget about my human problems and just be.

“G-Go away. I’ve got n-nothing to say to you.” That was a lie. I had words. So many words. Ones that showed how he’d broken me, destroyed the life I’d imagined for us, and zapped my confidence in how to judge others. While I sized up Kellan early on, pinpointing he was a dirtbag, I’d thought Ryder was different. Maybe that’s why they initially got together. They were alike.

“Please let me explain.”

Grabbing my shirt, I covered my cock and swirled around. “Explain what? How you lied to me and went behind my back to sleep with Kellan? Did you both laugh at poor gullible Ivor while you fucked him?”

“Don’t.” His strangled voice had me look at him, really look at him. Seeing him get out of the car this evening was the first time I’d sighted him since I stormed out of his office. There were shadows gouged under his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping, unlike me. The minute my head hit the pillow, I was asleep as I blocked out the world. His cheeks were sunken and when I lowered my eyes, I could count his ribs.

Good! I was pleased he was having a hard time, though juggling both me and Kellan must have taken up time and energy before I called time on our relationship.

“It’s all a lie, Ivor.”

“You got that right.” I clapped and yelled, “Bravo,” forgetting I was holding my shirt and it fell to my feet. Keeping my gaze on Ryder, I picked it up and hid my dick. “First truthful statement you’ve made. Got any other truth bombs?”

Ignoring my briefs, I picked up my jeans and shoved one leg in but overbalanced,leaving me hopping around on the uneven ground like a fool. Tears clouded my vision but I refused to let him see them. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

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