Page 10 of Inconveniently Matched

Haley

––––––––

Iguess I could startwith some redecorating.Purple.That’s my color.I’m thinking a splash of eggplant everywhere.

I get to work immediately.Everything has to be ready when they arrive back home tonight.I pull out my laptop and spend the next two hours in a buying frenzy, so much so that my fingers ache from all the "add to cart" clicks.I've thoroughly broken-in the credit card they’ve given me.Utilizing a tip Tammy gave me, I request immediate delivery when I send each online store a message stating this is for Mr.Wesley Manning, Mr.Dean Edwards, and Mr.Camden Nash.Well, that’s nice.

Next on my list is hiring staff.I know I told Tammy we would do it tomorrow, but this is part of my plan to mess with them, and I can’t resist following through.

Hmm... there are some really reputable agencies I could use to bring in the best people, but that feels boring.Instead, I find a general online utility board and post my requests.It doesn’t take long before I get a hundred and eighty-nine hits.Oh boy.Another hour later, I hire four people.

A butler, a housekeeper, a cleaner, and a chef.I offer them a salary worth ten times the norm and pay them in advance for six months.I have unlimited funds, right?Within the next hour, I’m inundated with deliveries, and the concierge, Ralph, a good, noble man with three daughters of his own, orchestrates everything for me with perfect precision.

Their once immaculate, monochromatic ivory mansion in the sky is now tainted and tacky with purple.I didn’t bother hiring a decorator; what I wanted, no professional in their right mind would implement.So I did it myself.I redecorated the heck out of their apartment by throwing everything purple at it.

Rugs, pillows, and long swaths of fabric are tossed into the air to see where they land.A couple of purple beanbags, some atrocious psychedelic wallpaper.It looks like a purple teddy bear threw up all over the place.I didn’t expect to have so much fun, but there you go.

I’ve created a maniacal masterpiece, as if a child—me—with a purple crayon and a bottle of glitter had free rein over their pearl and alabaster abode and didn’t hold back.It’s gone from white and smooth to purple and gothic.Loud, bold, gaudy, chic trash, if you will.Ostentatious.Baroque.Lurid.At the end of it all, it’s a hot purple mess, but now I’m wondering if their new apartment basically resembles me.

Too late to stop now since my new staff arrives.They’re a lovely bunch of people.We go over their roles once more, and I let them change into their uniforms while I do kind of the same.

I take ownership of the first bedroom I come across, then relocate the previous resident—Wesley.I can tell it's his room by his cologne.What?I’m being nice.I could have thrown his designer suits right out the window.It would have been raining silk socks and designer boxer briefs.

I hit the showers, gloss up my skin—not that it matters since they won’t be touching me at all—and get dressed.Night one with them is going to be a doozy.For them.

The floor-length strapless gown I choose to wear is light and soft, with swaths of black material wrapping around my body, hugging my curves extra tight.It brushes the floor as I walk.

Downstairs, I take in my masterpiece once more.It’s amazing what endless amounts of money can do.Fine, I did feel bad for maybe a second, probably two, but they asked for this.Their penthouse is unrecognizable.

I beam at the sound of the door opening.They’re here.Let the games begin.

I rush to the door and plant a huge smile on my face.

“Well, hello there, my three husbands,” I say as cheerfully as I can.It wasn’t in my game plan to give them kisses, but I do.Stupid rookie mistake, because the instant my lips make contact with their jaws, the scent of their cologne seeps into me, and the heat of their bodies fills mine.I’m spectacularly misplaced and uncomfortably aware of a sudden deluge of wetness soaking my underwear.Drat.

They just stand in the foyer of their penthouse, which I purposefully left unblemished from my purple warfare to give them a false sense that everything is copacetic, looking at me amused with their stupid grins on their stupid, handsome faces.

I remember why I’m here and how easy it would have been for me not to be here in the first place.All they had to do was refuse to marry me.That thought bolsters me right back up again.

It doesn’t help that Cass thinks she belongs to them and struts after them, full of energy.Twice a traitor now.

I plaster a huge fake smile on my face and gesture for them to enter the open living areas of their own house—yes, their own house—that is not lost on me, despite being their wife.Oh god.How am I, theirwife?

The MEN come to a dead halt before a sea of sparkly purple.

“Oh, I hope you don’t mind.I took the liberty of sprucing the place up a little.It needed some...purple.Isn’t it wonderful?Do you like it?I did it all for you,” I say, my voice saccharine-sweet.“Thank you for the unlimited funds.I hadsomuch fun shopping.Please tell me you like it,” I plead.Apparently, I could be an actress if I wanted.

“It’s a fucking—” Wesley starts to say, his jaw clenching, but then he seems to change his mind.“Masterpiece,” he continues.

“It’s great,” Dean says.

“Very purple,” Camden adds.

“I’m so glad,” I say, clapping my hands.“I thought you would hate all the gothic glitz and glitter.”I sigh theatrically, holding my heart as if I genuinely cared about their opinion.Fuck.They were supposed to hate it so much they’d demand an immediate annulment.

Disappointment sails through me.They’re harder nuts to crack.Which is fine.I have four aces up my sleeve, and surprisingly, one of them is actually called Ace.

“I also took the liberty of hiring us staff.A butler, a housekeeper, a server, and a chef.You’re going to love them.I handpicked them myself.Come on, I’ll introduce you,” I say, leading them to their own dining room.“Hope you’re hungry.We’re having Italian tonight.”But that I mean pizza and pasta.

---