Page 37 of Broken Player

The fact he was freakishly strong was throwing me for a loop. It had to be whatever drug he was on. I’d have to do something fucked up but I didn’t have a choice. I jerked my knee up and connected it straight with his groin, dropping him instantly. As he moaned and writhed on the floor, I jogged into the kitchen and grabbed a zip tie out of the junk drawer before running back and trapping his hands behind his back.

I sat back on my heel as he glared at me with so much hate, it burned through me, consuming any thoughts I might’ve had that someday my dad might actually outgrow his demons and realize what a fucking mistake he made all these years. That maybe someday he’d actually be proud of me. With one glare, every small fraction of hope I held on to throughout my life went up in smoke and I didn’t have the energy to feel anything.

Panting, I stood up, unsure what to do with myself. My legs moved on their own and before I could process where I was going, I stood outside Ryan’s bedroom window. My hand moved as if on its own accord and I found myself tapping on the warm glass. Less than ten seconds later, Ryan was there, lifting the window and leaning out of it like a breath of fresh air.

“Maddox? Are you okay?” her voice was concerned as she looked over my battered face, her forehead wrinkled with worry.

“I don’t even fucking know,” I answered honestly.

“Come in,” she demanded, leaving no room for me to argue with her. I climbed into the window and she slid it shut behind me. I looked around her room, the floral quilt covering her bed and the thousand throw pillows of all different colors made the room bright and cheery. It was the same room I’d been in a hundred times as a kid, only more grown up. This was a woman’s room now.

“Sit,” she ordered, pointing at her bed. I lowered myself onto the pillowy mattress and looked up at her. My mind had gone completely blank and all I could focus on at this moment was Ryan. Her soulful brown eyes locked onto mine, her sweet, plump lips turned down slightly in a frown as she inspected my cheek.

“I’m going to get the first aid kit. Stay here.” She turned and left the room, shutting the door with a soft click. I blew out a breath, not even sure where to start with processing everything that happened in the last hour with Russell. This was why I left and never looked back. Russell was toxic, poison of the always fatal variety. Subjecting myself to him was asking for drama and a lot of fucking pain.

I dealt with a lot of shit in my life, made a lot of problems disappear. I’d done things I wasn’t necessarily proud of, but I was a protector at heart. I always had been. And when someone fucked with my family, I was the one who stepped up and fixed shit. But when the problems were mine, it was different. Ever since I opened my heart to Ryan, I’d been obsessing about how to make her mine. How to make her see that she’d always been mine.

But the reasons I left still held true. Just look at what happened tonight with Russell. No matter how bad I wanted her, I would never put her through what I just experienced at the hands of my father. No fucking way. I needed to rid myself ofthe weight on my life that was Russell Everleigh for good before I could fully be the man Ryan needed me to be.

The door swung open and she walked in carrying a white box. Shutting the door, she crossed the room until she stood in front of me, kneeling down until she was at my eye level. Her creamsicle scent wrapped around me and as her fingertips brushed across my cheek, I closed my eyes.

“I don’t think you’ll need stitches, but this is going to hurt,” she stated, pressing an alcohol wipe against the cut. I hissed, but as quickly as the sting started it was gone. I watched her as she took care of me, a deep longing settling in my chest. I’d never had anyone to take care of me except Ryan when we were kids. Flashes of memories ran through my mind as I watched her. We spent so many nights like this as kids, Russell taking every bad thing life threw his way out on my body and me fleeing to the safety of Ryan’s house.

She bandaged up my face and wordlessly cleaned up the supplies. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked, looking up at me from her spot on the floor.

I shook my head. “There’s nothing to talk about. Shit never changes.”

She bit her lip and I watched intently, wanting to take that plump lip between my teeth like I had last night. Every whimper, moan, and taste we shared during that kiss had branded me for life, the heat of the moment leaving a raised scar with her name across my soul.

I watched as thoughts crossed her mind. Her face had always been so easy to read for me. She brightened up suddenly, her eyes twinkling. “Blanket fort?” she suggested.

I chuckled, the first cracks of sunlight breaking through the blackness of this night and she’d been the one to punch through. “We haven’t done that since we were kids.”

Ryan sat up even straighter, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “I know, it’ll be awesome. C’mon, Maddox. Pleeeaaase?” she begged, her hands clasped together under her chin while she batted her eyelashes up at me.

Truthfully, the idea of spending time in a blanket fort with Ryan was both a dream and a nightmare and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep my hands to myself. I wanted a repeat of last night more than I wanted anything, but it wouldn’t be fair to her on so many levels. But was I strong enough to resist?

I sighed heavily. I was way too emotionally drained to go back to Russell’s right now or deny myself more time with Ryan. “Depends. What movie are we watching?”

She smiled wide because she knew she had me. “What else would we watch?Jackass, duh.”

I grinned despite the pain in my face and the darkness still lingering inside me.Jackasshad been our favorite movie as kids. Her parents told us we weren’t allowed to watch it, but we got our hands on a copy and never let it go. We watched it so many times we both knew all the words.

I stood up off the bed, grabbing the quilt and tossing a few of the pillows onto the floor. “I’ll make the fort, you grab the popcorn,” I suggested.

“You know if I go make popcorn, Quinn’s going to smell it and be in here right in the middle of us, right?”

Quinn seemed like a good enough guy when I met him last night. He’d been looking out for my girl when I wouldn’t let myself. But I didn’t know if I liked him enough to spend the night cuddled up next to him in a tiny fort. “Better try to avoid him then,” I said with a smirk.

She laughed, shaking her head. “You obviously don’t know Quinn at all.”

“Obviously not,” I agreed, tossing more pillows on the floor. Why did one person need so many goddamn pillows?

I watched as she darted out the door and it took me all of five minutes to set up the structure. I did this so many times when I was a kid it was like riding a bicycle. Everything came right back like I never left at all. When it was done, I crawled inside, kicking off my boots and arranging the pillows and blankets on the floor into a makeshift bed.

The door closed softly and the buttery smell of popcorn wafted into the fort. Ryan’s freckled arm shot out, holding the bowl out for me to grab so she could crawl inside. She settled next to me, pulling a blanket up over both of us as we laid back against the pillows. My left side was touching her right side, the heat of her skin searing me through my clothes. I wanted to pull her into my arms, hold her close to my body and forget about everything outside this fort. But I couldn’t.

I was quickly realizing this night was about to be torturous as fuck.

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