Page 39 of Broken Player

I was officially free.

I might as well have been floating for how goddamn light I felt now that I owned the ranch, and Russell was gone for good. I hadn’t realized when I came out here how much I needed this. How much I needed to take control of my past, face it head-on, and let that shit go. I was ready to move forward, to embrace the man I knew I could be. Seeing the mess Russell had made of his life all these years later, I realized something. Ryan was right. I wasnevergoing to become like my old man.

Not a fucking chance.

I watched him become a monster when I was a kid, or maybe he’d always been that way. Either way, I’d never been more determined to prove that that would never be me. Sure, I had a little too much fun when Shadow Phoenix had first made it, but I’d gone to rehab and a shit ton of therapy to learn my lessons and get as healthy as possible.

Had I still held onto the anger and resentment? The abandonment issues? Yep. But, I ripped the chains off of myself by buying the ranch. The feeling of kicking Russell out of my life permanently was indescribable. Looking around the house that was now mine, I realized I needed to get a cleaning crew in here to throw out everything. Better yet, calling a contractor might be the best move. I wanted to strip this place down to the studs and start fresh.

Short of leveling the building to the ground and rebuilding something entirely new, this was the best plan. I made a mental note to talk to Joel about it. Despite the sexy as fuck girl next door who I was pretty sure I was still in love with all these years later, I had no plans to live here permanently. I doubted I’d spend much time here at all. Still, I had plans for this place, and I wanted it to be somewhere I felt comfortable visiting if I ever felt the need.

Now that I’d thought of Ryan, she was like a beacon to my brain. I wanted to see her, spend time with her, get to know who she was now. I wanted to make her mine. Glancing at the calendar hanging on the wood-paneled wall, my heart sank a little as I realized there were only two and a half weeks until she married another man. I was running out of time.

Skipping breakfast and downing a scalding mug of black coffee, I set the empty cup into the sink. Now that shit was squared away here, it was time I focus my efforts on Ryan. I was determined to make her see we belonged together.

Locking the door, I slid my keys into my pocket and pulled the black baseball hat I wore down over my eyes. The sun was fucking intense out here, and the walk wasn’t exactly short to the Knight’s house. But I didn’t mind, it gave me time to think about how I wanted to approach things with Ryan. I knew she didn’t fully trust me, considering what I put her through. I never thought my walking away would affect her like it had, that it would hurt her like it did me.

I figured she was just a teenage girl with a crush, that once she saw what I became, she’d be glad I spared her a life with me. Fuck, I’d been so stupid. So incredibly stupid.

The wooden porch steps creaked under my weight as I climbed them, rapping my knuckles on the front door. I didn’t have to wait long before the door swung open, and Quinn lookedback at me through the screen door, a slow grin breaking out across his face.

“Let me guess. You’re not here to see me?” he asked with a chuckle.

“Not today, buddy. Sorry,” I smiled back. I figured being friendly with Ryan’s best friend was probably my best bet to getting on her good side. Maybe he’d even put in a good word for me. Plus, he seemed like a good dude. “Is Ryan around?”

Quinn pushed the door open, standing back so I could come in. “Yeah, she’s just finishing breakfast. You know where the dining room is?”

I nodded. “You aren’t staying?”

“Nope, I was just on my way out. I’ve got an appointment in Dallas,” he explained before leaning in a little closer and lowering his voice. “If you want to get on her good side, stick around today and help with the chores. Since I won’t be here, she’ll have to do it all on her own.”

I reached over and patted him on the back, thankful for his advice. I had a feeling I had an ally in Quinn when it came to Ryan, but I wanted to be sure. “Why are you helping me?” I questioned.

He glanced over my shoulder before his eyes darted back to me. “I want Ryan to be happy, and I have a feeling you might be just the guy to give her that, even if you obviously don’t have a clue how to treat a woman.”

Narrowing my eyes at him, I hated to admit he was right. I’d been a complete asshole to every woman I’d ever spent time with, no matter how short. Ryan had always been different, but I still ended up hurting her. Finally, I sighed deeply. “I want to make her happy, Quinn. But she’s fucking engaged to another man, and I don’t want to cross lines and make her into a cheater.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Didn’t you already make out with her behind the bar?”

“Yeah, and I’ve been guilty as fuck about it ever since,” I admitted.

“Don’t be. Trust me when I say to keep doing what you’re doing. I think she’ll come around. But you better get your ass in gear if you want to have a chance. There’s not a lot of time left.”

“Yeah, I hear the goddamn clock ticking, man. Trust me, I’m aware.”

Quinn moved back to the door, pulling out his keys before looking back at me. “Good luck,” he said before closing the door softly behind him. Taking a deep breath, I turned and walked toward the dining room I’d spent so much time in as a kid. The only reason I knew what a family dinner was like was because of Ryan’s family.

Stepping into the room, she didn’t notice me right away, so I took the opportunity to watch her. She leaned over a book she had open on the tabletop next to her plate. Her hair fell over her shoulders in waves, brushing her upper arm. She lifted her coffee to her lips, taking a small sip as her eyes never left the page. As I studied her, my chest constricted, the beauty of her almost painful for me to look at.

Ryan must’ve sensed my staring as she finally looked up at me. Her doe eyes widened as she lifted them to meet mine before smiling like she was actually happy to see me.

“You gonna stand there staring all morning?” she teased.

I couldn’t help my smile back, moving to take the chair beside her. “Would it be so bad if I did?”

She laughed, brushing her hair behind her shoulder and watching me over the rim of her mug as she took another sip. “I don’t know how to answer that,” she said honestly.

“Okay, well, a little bird told me you might need some help around here today.” I reached out and took her mug, taking agulp of the hot liquid before passing it back. I watched as her eyes darkened before she snapped herself out of it. My cocky smirk told her I knew the effect I had on her. I did it on purpose. I might not be able to kiss her or do other less innocent things to her right now, but I was going to pull out every other flirtation and seduction technique I’d ever learned.

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