Page 33 of Your Secret to Keep

Mack hands me a plate and tilts her head to the counter where all the food is waiting for us to dig in. “The game starts in a few minutes. Get a plate.”

Riley stands and I follow, my mouth watering at the smell of hot smoky wings filling the kitchen.

Chris comes out of the pantry with a bag. “You have to try these. Had a colleague bring cashews back from a business trip in India.” He holds the bag out to me with the top open.

The smell of the nuts makes my stomach churn. “I’m okay. Thanks though,” I try to politely decline.

“Oh, come on. They’re so good.” Chris reaches in, grabs a cashew, and pops it in his mouth. He shakes the bag at me with a little smirk.

“I can’t—”

“Sure you can,” Chris insists, interrupting me.

“No, I’m allergic to cashews.” My voice is quiet, but the kitchen is quieter.

A red flush creeps into my dad’s cheeks, and I feel like mine match. He slowly closes the bag, keeping his eyes glued to the floor as he walks the nuts back to the pantry.

“Are you allergic to peanuts?” Mack asks, her voice soft but still cutting through the silence.

“No, just tree nuts. Cashews are the worst though.”

Mack nods, Riley uses a spoon to scoop a dip on her plate, and Chris doesn’t say anything. It’s something small, something people close to me have known mostly my entire life, but this is an example of things that get lost in a situation like mine.

“Ugh, sorry. I should know that…” Chris apologizes, his voice soft on the edges.

Lifting my hands up, I say, “No, how could you? It’s no problem. I’ll pass on the cashews though.” I try to laugh it off, giving slack to the tense rope cutting through us.

I’m not angry or disappointed, but it does fucking sting.

It serves as a reminder of all the experiences we’ve missed out on together.

Chapter 20

Brooks

I’mbackhomeaftercelebrating a Cosmos win with my family, which is still weird to say. When I look out the patio door and see the steam rising from the pool, wrestling with the chilled November air, images of Lia rush back. I’m licking my fucking lips thinking of her. I snap a picture of the pool and text it to Lia.

Lia

don’t tempt me

Me

i don’t know what you’re talking about

sure you don’t

good Cosmos win today

did you watch?

yeah, i was with my dad

nice to see them

wish no one would’ve seen Zack’spregame fit though

haha he does love a fashion moment

---