Page 22 of You've Got Male

She looked at Julie, who was looking back, so incredibly proud of herself.

“How are things going in the world of love and romance?” Tasha asked.

“Pretty slow. However, the coffee world moves at the speed of light, so if you’ll excuse me.”

Evie tried to move but Tasha blocked her path. Evie went left and right and left again, but she was trapped.

“Just go about what you normally do. This will make you more relatable,” she whispered, then turned back to her phone. “We’re coming to you live with Evie of You’ve Got Male. It’s a balmy day in the heart of Denver and spectators have flocked to Grinder, one of the oldest coffee houses downtown, to see our bachelorette as she heats up the coffee scene while making one of her famous Everything I Brew I Brew for You mochaccinos.”

“It’s our daily special,” Moira said to the crowd.

Evie’s irritation was boiling as hot as the espresso machine. Unfortunately, there were too many witnesses to scald her loved ones with her famous mochas. So Evie went about her business, walking back around the counter and over to the machine, while Tasha gave blow-by-blow commentary on Evie’s every move.

“What’s an Everything I Brew I Brew for You mochaccino?” Evie whispered to Julie.

“It was your mom’s idea.” She pointed to the board and saw a new collection of romance-inspired drinks. Love is in the Latte.Cupid’s Cappuccino. Fabio Frappuccino. Bodice Ripper Blended Brew. Chai on Love.

Evie rolled her eyes. She was reaching for the cocoa powder when the ring-light came into her periphery, nearly blinding her.

“Look at how she steams up that cream,” Tasha said. “Those hands are capable and proficient, but with a gentle touch, fellas.”

A round of hoots filled the air and she heard her mom above the crowd say, “She gets that gentle touch from me.”

“Who’s going to be the first one to give our bachelorette a rose?” Tasha said.

“Bachelorette?” Evie choked out and that’s when she realized just how big this hoax had become. The men with roses seemed to have doubled and now they were standing in a line, flanking the counter. Each one looked more excited than the last. The only things missing were the limos and glamorous mansion.

Evie had walked into her worst nightmare.

“First up, we’ve got Steve the Stockbroker coming to us from Boulder.” Tasha waved over a man in an expensive suit who looked like aGQmodel with a dadbod. “Steve, tell us why you’re here?”

“For this beautiful woman, of course,” Steve the Stockbroker said to the camera.

Evie snorted. She was dressed in a frumpy uniform, her hair looked like a feather duster, and she didn’t have a speck of makeup on.

“I’ve got a lot to offer any single mom,” Steve said. He had the kind of voice Evie imagined the Most Mysterious Man in the World had. Which was another thing Evie didn’t do—mysterious. “All my friends tell me I’ll make the best dad. I’m a partner at my firm, I cook like a five-star chef, I’m a great catch, and I’ve got a weekend home in Steamboat Springs.”

Of course Steve the Stockbroker would have a house in Steamboat Springs. He also had a superhero complex. And anego that he clearly needed to have stroked.

“Evie,” Tasha said, “the only question is, will you accept Steve’s rose?”

Evie looked at the rose, then at her mom, and narrowed her eyes.

Vetted, my ass.

Evie plastered a pleasant smile on her face and said, “Sorry Steve, but it will have to be a pass.”

Unfazed, Steve looked deep into the camera. “If anyone out there is looking for a single, successful Sagittarius, just hit me up. My handle is @Steve-Broker. I prefer petite blondes who work out and have an adventurous side.”

Evie was neither petite nor blond. And Stockbroker Steve was clearly looking for a social media boost. Her gym membership expired six years ago and the last time she’d given in to her adventurous side she wound up pregnant and alone.

Evie turned to escape back into the kitchen. She hadn’t even made it a foot when Tasha snagged her arm.

“Don’t give up yet,” Tasha said. “You’re onenocloser to that bigyes! Which brings us to Travis from TechStar, who came from Fort Collins. Travis, tell Evie a little about yourself.”

Travis looked like a typical tech guy in his skinny jeans, untucked dress shirt with rolled-up sleeves, and hair with that perfect wave at the front like he’d just come from the hairdresser. He also had on a watch that likely cost more than Evie’s life savings and probably spoke a hundred different languages.

“Hi, Evie.” He clasped her hand between both of his and was about to say something else when his watchpinged. Maintaining hold of her hand, he flipped it over so he could see the face of his watch. “So nice to meet you,” he said distractedly, then looked up at her like that was a normal greeting.

---