Page 45 of If You Stayed

“Kierra.” Rosie pouted. “Please. It’s my birthday weekend, and I really want to go with you! It would be the best birthday ever.”

I grumbled, feeling guilty. If that was her main birthday wish, I could make it come true. Besides, how bad could a party at Brett’s be? “If we go—”

“We’re going!”

“Ifwe go,” I continued, “we only stay for a while, and we leave together. No matter what.”

“And you’ll kiss Brett Stevens.”

“I’m not kissing Brett Stevens.”

“Why not? You’ve been crazy about him for years!”

“I know,” I agreed. “That’s exactly why I don’t want to kiss him. You don’t kiss the person you’re crazy about. Then there’s always room for a letdown. I’ve never even spoken to the guy. I prefer to keep my distance from him.”

“Like a creeper lurker in the bushes.”

“Exactly. Then he can’t crush my crush on him due to not being interested.”

“Why wouldn’t he be interested in you? News flash, Kierra—you’re hot. Yeah, sure you went through your weird brace-face phrase, but you came out stronger for it.”

“I…don’t know if that’s a compliment.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll pick you up at eight. This is going to be so much fun.”

Why did I not have the heart to tell her I didn’t want to go? Oh, because I was a sucker for wanting to please other people before myself. If I had it my way, I’d be home each night reading about fictional people who felt more alive than most real humans.

Later that night when Rosie showed up, I dreaded draggingmyself over to the party. I felt a mixture of nerves, panic, and excitement. What if I officially talked to Brett that night? What if we were able to interact with each other? What if he had a crush on me the same way I had a crush on him?

Clearly, I was in a full-blown delusional state as I walked up his front steps. The party was blasting with music, and a ton of people I knew but didn’t really know were all over the place laughing and drinking.

It was funny how you could be around people all the time and realize not a single person knew anything about you.

“Drinks, drinks, we need drinks!” Rosie cheered. She placed her hands on my shoulders and locked her eyes with mine. “Don’t move, okay? I’ll grab drinks. Vodka or tequila?”

“Water.”

Rosie smiled. “Vodka it is!”

She hurried away, and I leaned backward against the staircase. As my eyes darted around the room, I felt more and more out of place. The things we did for friends.

“Penguin, what the hell are you doing here?” was heard from my left.

I looked over to meet Gabriel’s brown eyes and felt a wave of comfort. Someone I actually knew and loved. My eyes moved to the person Gabriel had his arm wrapped around. Ali Thomas.

Ugh.

They’d been dating for over a year, and I was almost certain I was her sworn enemy. I’d never even done anything to her, but I knew it was because Gabriel was my best friend. It wasn’t shocking that the girls Gabriel dated had something againstme. I probably would feel weird, too, if my boyfriend’s best friend was another girl.

But there was nothing between Gabriel and me except the greatest of friendships. Ali had nothing to worry about. Still, I got her cold, harsh stares whenever we crossed paths.

I smiled. “Rosie wanted me to come to my first party in celebration of her birthday.”

Gabriel’s brow knit. “You could’ve just bought her a gift. You hate parties.”

“Yeah, well. It’s what she requested.”

Ali smirked and shook her head. “What would you even do at a party? Read a book?”

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