Page 84 of Landon & Shay: Part Two

Then why wasn’t I enough?

My chest tightened and I felt my emotions beginning to swirl as Landon was working his way into my heart. A heart that I worked hard to keep closed-off from men—from him especially.

Stop it, heart, I ordered.Don’t you dare skip for the man who shattered you to pieces.

I reached down to his hardness and began stroking it as he shut his eyes. Then, I flipped him over to his back and I leaned forward and began sucking it, loving the moans that escaped his lips. My tongue ran up and down his shaft as he grew stiffer and stiffer in my hold. I loved that. I loved feeling how my touch brought him pleasure. I loved seeing how his body reacted to me. I loved…

No, Shay.

No feelings needed.

It’s just sex.

I looked up to those blue, dilated eyes that looked ravished. He loved it, too. He loved when I looked up at him with his hardness in my mouth, pleasing him. He loved that connection, and I secretly craved it, too. In those moments, it almost felt as if we were one. As if the energy racing through his veins was what was used to fuel my soul. We created sparks of life with just our touch.

He stared at me as if he had every plan to devour every single part of me. I slowly thumbed my clit as he watched me. He pulled me up and flipped me onto the mattress, putting the control back in his hands. He became wilder when he craved me, and I needed that. I needed the wildness of Landon, not the calm. The calm made me think, the wild made me feel.

All I wanted was to feel him, to taste him, to fuck him.

It was nothing personal.

It couldn’t be.

I wouldn’t allow it.

“You want me to let you in?” I whispered, as his lips sucked against my neck.

“Yes,” he hissed against my skin.

“Okay then.” I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him into me as he pressed his throbbing cock against my opening. “Come on in.”

He slid into me hard, determined to fuck me harder than we’d fucked before, and I allowed him to stay a while.

27

Landon

I thoughtthat the interactions with Shay were going well, up until I talked to Raine and learned Shay had lost her job weeks prior because of me. She hadn’t been able to find a new form of employment, either, which made me feel damn awful.

I was such an asshole.

Shay’s face had been broadcast all across the internet all because of me showing up at her place of employment. The paparazzi wouldn’t have even been there if it weren’t for me, and due to that, she hadn’t been able to land another job.

I knew better than to walk into establishments without being highly incognito, but was I wrong for wanting to have one moment in my life not feeling as if I was caged to the tasks of celebrity?

I wanted a chance to see Shay and be normal with her again. To try to build up a friendship with her after messing up so many years before. I was an idiot going to her place of employment, and now she was jobless and a fucking internet meme.

She didn’t even tell me about her struggles, because we didn’t talk on that level. She didn’t let me in.

I never wanted that for her. I knew what it felt like to be mocked online and bullied by trolls. Shay didn’t deserve that. She was in a vulnerable position, and I was certain anyone would’ve reacted the way she had with what that woman was saying to her. But, sadly, their breakdowns weren’t caught on film.

I wracked my brain over and over, trying to figure out what I could’ve done to make this right. I needed a way to fix the mess that Shay was slugging through, and the only thing that came to mind was going back to the basics.

Back to the woman who taught Shay and I both so much about life.

“Sorry, we’re closing up for the night,” a sweet voice said as I pushed open the door to Harmony, a yoga studio in downtown Chicago. It was a stunning studio, and the peace I felt walking inside was overwhelming. Calming jazz music played over the speakers, and essential oils filled the space. Lavender, I assumed.

“Maybe you can find about five minutes to talk to an old friend?” I said, making the older woman turn around and look my way.

---