Page 107 of Landon & Shay: Part One

“I needed…” I shut my eyes and took deep inhales. “I needed you, and you weren’t there.”

I never admitted to needing anything or anyone, because I thought it would’ve made me weak. Yet there I was—weak, broken, and still in need of that fucking hug.

“I needed you, Mom, and you still got on that plane and left. Didn’t you know? Didn’t you know I needed you?”

“I did,” she said. She lowered her head and stared at the parking lot pavement.

“That’s it? That’s all you can give me? Because honestly, I’m going to need a lot more than that.”

“Landon…your father and I…he…we’re…” She swallowed hard and looked back up to me. “Your father is leaving me.”

Wait…what?

She nervously shifted around in her shoes. “We’ve been struggling for some time now, ever since Lance passed away. We fought a lot over my brother’s death, and he blamed me for your struggles for allowing Lance to stay with us all those years.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“Sometimes I wonder if he’s right. Sometimes I wonder about the mistakes I’ve made raising you around my brother, knowing of his mental struggles.”

“Lance was a good man, Mom. He taught me a lot of good. Life was better with him around. With you both around.”

A weighted sigh slipped through her lips. “It’s good to hear that, Landon. You have no clue. But, your father isn’t in love with me anymore and doesn’t wish to continue in this marriage. He said he doesn’t feel as if we are a right fit, therefore he’s leaving me. It’s been in the works for a while now. I’ve been struggling, trying to find my footing. When I married your father, I thought it would be forever. So, when he gave me a prenup, I signed it without a moment’s thought. But…he’s taking everything, Landon. He’s leaving me with nothing. That’s why I was in Hawaii, meeting with Katie’s divorce lawyer. Then, the girls were helping use their connections to land me stylist jobs. That’s why I started back working. I needed some kind of income.”

“He’s taking everything?”

“Yes. Every cent. That’s why I was so curious about if he was messing around with April, because of a clause in the prenup. If he cheated, I would’ve at least not lost everything. I would’ve received income which I could’ve used toward your college funds.”

I arched an eyebrow. “Toward my college?”

“Yes. I know how much you don’t want to go into law next fall, but your father is determined that you do for his own selfish reasons. I don’t want that for you, though. I’ve lived under your father’s shadow for so long, I don’t want that for you. I want to be able to provide for you and give you the income to help with you going into the major of your choice. That’s why when these jobs came up, I had to take them. I knew I couldn’t lose out on such a big lump sum of money that could’ve been used to help you.”

She was thinking of me. After all these weeks I’d spent being upset with her, it turned out she was thinking of me the whole time. She wasn’t abandoning me—she was fighting for me. She wasn’t going on these luxury trips around the world, she was hustling hard to provide for me.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“The lawyer said it would be best to get all my ducks in a row before bringing you into it. They didn’t want your involvement pushing your father to be more vicious than he already plans to be. I wanted to tell you sooner, Land. I hated keeping this from you. I hated holding this all in for so long, but…” Her body began shaking in the chilled air, and I took off my coat and wrapped it around her.

I didn’t know what to say, so I said the only thing that really came to mind. “I’m sorry Dad’s a dick.”

She laughed and started crying. “It’s okay.”

Without any more thought, I hugged her, and like always, I melted into her arms. “I’m sorry,” I said again, this time for her hurting. She cried into my shoulder, and I held her even tighter.

She pulled back a little, nervously laughing as she wiped away her tears. “I didn’t plan on crying, I swear.”

“You always cry.”

“Not always,” she snickered. “I got your flowers,” she said, handing me the now smooshed up bouquet from our hug. “They looked better before, I swear. I’m not sure if you’re supposed to give male actors flowers, but I’m your mother, so you’re getting flowers.”

I smirked. “Thanks.”

“Do you want to go home and watch some bad movies and stuff our faces?” she asked.

“One hundred percent.”

For the time being, I put KJ to the back of my mind. I knew I’d have to deal with that sooner than later, but for now, Mom was home, and I didn’t want to waste a minute of my time with her.

“I can cook us something,” she offered.

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