Page 133 of Landon & Shay: Part One

And then, I want to have you.

I want all of you, Shay, but not like this.

I want to get my mind right first, fix myself, so I can be yours.

So, this is my formal letter to let you know that I’m working to never be fake again.

I won’t fake being popular.

I won’t fake loving parties.

I won’t fake being content with life.

I won’t fake fitting in.

It will be real. I’ll be real first for me, and then for you.

After I’m done with this, I’m planning on reaching out to my mom for help. I’m going to get help. I want to get better. I want this life more than I ever thought I could, and that’s because of you.

You awakened my spirit after so many nightmares, and for that, I owe you the world.

I love you.

-Landon.

P.S.

I love you.

I said it once so you’d hear me.

Twice to leave an imprint.

I sat back on the couch, feeling a rush of emotions racing through me. Yet, the one that stood out the most was the fact that he said he was going to get help. That alone made me cry. It took a strong man to admit to needing a hand.

I pulled out my phone and sent him a message.

Me:How’s your heart tonight?

It took him a few hours to answer, but relief swept through me as my phone dinged later that night.

Landon:Still beating.

32

Landon

Shay:Meet me at the willows.

I read her text over and over again. Mom had been home for a few days, sorting things out for me. I was going to take a year off from college and work on my mental health. Dad flipped out when he heard the news, but Mom stood by my side through and through.

“Hey, I’m going to go see someone really quick if that’s okay,” I told Mom as she sat at the dining room table, fumbling through paperwork. She’d been very protective of me since she got back, not allowing me to be alone for too long. She even went as far as trying to pull her mattress into my bedroom to sleep on in order to keep me from being on my own.

“Where to? Who are you seeing?”

“Just to the park to see Shay.”

She raised an eyebrow, and a small smirk appeared on her lips. “Shay? That’s the girl?”

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