Page 111 of Landon & Shay: Part One

She stood up straighter. “What is it?” She stepped closer to me, concern in her eyes. “How’s your heart?”

I snickered. “You’re sounding a lot like your grandmother.”

“Landon,” she said sternly, placing her hand against my chest, “how’s your heart?”

Chills raced through me. “Still beating.”

“Good,” she muttered, nodding slowly, “good.”

I shifted around in my shoes. “Look, I don’t know how to say this, so I’m going to blurt it out because if I keep it in anymore, I’m going to explode so—”

“I love you,” she said, cutting me off.

Every thought I’d been thinking left me right in that moment. Every negative feeling in my head evaporated into thin air. My stare fell to her lips, and for a second, I thought I’d imagined it. I thought I was so delusional from the past few days that I’d officially lost my mind. She must’ve picked up on the baffled look in my eyes, because she stepped closer to me and took my hands into hers.

“Sorry,” she whispered. “I just wanted to say it before you. I’m fine with losing the bet, because I love you.” She paused and narrowed her eyes. “That’s what you were going to say, right? That you love me?”

I grimaced, and she flicked slightly.

Her cheeks turned red and she dropped her head. “Oh…”

Shit.

I saw the emotional spilling out of her eyes. “No, that’s not it. But—”

“It’s okay, Landon, because I love you,” she repeated. “I love you, I love you, I love you. And I know this means I’ve lost the bet. I know this means you win, and I don’t even care because I love you, and loving you makes me feel like a winner. I just wanted to tell you that, because I couldn’t keep it in much longer. You don’t even have to say it back. I don’t care. Because I don’t think you tell people you love them just so you can hear it back. I think you tell people you love them because it feels like a rocket in your soul. The love becomes so powerful that it shoots through you until you’re finally forced to express it through words. So yeah,” She laughed nervously and shrugged her shoulders. “This is awkward, but I love you, Landon Harrison. I love you in the light and in the dark. I love you like a whisper and like a shout. I love your good days and your bad days, and I…love…you. All of you. Every single piece…” She began fiddling with her fingers, and her T-shirt collar moved between her lips, “And every single scar.”

I moved in closer to her and placed my forehead against hers. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard, breathing her in.

“Why would you love someone like me?” I asked.

“Because it’s impossible not to.”

I opened my eyes and looked into hers. I wanted to say it back, I wanted to tell her how I loved her first. How I felt it first. How I lost the bet way back when on my birthday, but it wasn’t the right time.

First, I needed to tell her the hardest truth she’d ever have to hear. “Shay…there’s something you should know about your father.”

She pulled back a little and her brown eyes locked with mine. “What is it? Did he…” She stood up straight. “Did he say something to you? Did he offend you? Did he—”

“He lied. He’s been lying to you, to your mother, about so many things.”

“What are you talking about?” she choked out, her voice shaky with confusion.

“Shay, he, um…” Why were the words now freezing up in my throat? Maybe because I saw her nerves. Maybe because I knew how much she loved her father, even if she wished she hadn’t. Maybe because I knew what I said next was going to break her heart. “He’s a dealer. He’s been dealing shit to kids at our school.”

Her face shifted a bit, but the lack of surprise in her eyes kind of shocked me. “I know. That’s why Mima got so fed up with him. He used to deal in the past…but we thought he stopped. We’d thought he’d pulled his life together. We’d thought he’d got solid jobs and was on the up and up. But…he lied. Because that’s what he does. He lies. And still, my mom keeps choosing him.”

I raised an eyebrow. “And she knows?”

“Yeah. We all know.”

“No, I mean…” I swallowed hard. “She knows about his other daughter?”

She laughed.

No shit, she laughed. Really hard, too.

“Wait, what?” she said between giggles. She looked at me and her laughter began to dissipate as she saw the seriousness in my stare. “Wait. What?”

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