Page 120 of If It Can't Be Us

She presses her body against me, toying with the hair at the nape of my neck, and kisses me seductively, egging me on.

I match her intensity, and we make out heatedly in her bedroom for several minutes.

Remembering that we are in her parent’s home, and this is my first time meeting them, I pull back.

“Damn, you drive me crazy, you know that?” I say, smirking. “We should get back to your parents before they come looking for us.”

“You might want to give it a few minutes,” she says with a mischievous grin, eyeing my boner. “Better think of a turn off real quick,” she says, laughing. “How about Gary and Brenda naked… or my parents having sex?” she offers up freely.

“Jesus, now I won’t be able to look them in the eye at dinner,” I say chuckling.

“Come on, let’s go.” She gestures to the door, and we join her parents at the dinner table, where Vivian and her mom talk about all the latest Park City gossip, and her dad and I chat about The Open, keeping one eye on the TV throughout the meal.

Her dad is hilarious and has me laughing on multiple occasions.

After dinner and clean-up, we play a game ofCards Against Humanity, which has me rolling on the floor with laughter. These people are so cool, and when Vivian’s mom wins by playing a card that readsMy mother’s double-sided dildo, we die laughing.

We stay until late in the evening, chatting around the dining room table. When we say our farewells, Vivian’s mom pulls me into a hug as if I’m her own son. It triggers a pang of sadness in me, knowing my own mother never hugged me like this.

As we leave, I can’t help but feel a sense of belonging that I’ve rarely experienced. I squeeze Vivian’s hand a little tighter, grateful for her and for the life we’re about to build together.

* * * * ** * * * *

“My parents loved you,” Vivian remarks, as I navigate us home in the rental car.

“They’re really great,” I reply, my eyes flicking to her briefly before returning to the road. “Glad I managed to win them over.”

“Well, it’s not difficult to like you.”

I reach over and take her hand, letting it rest in mine on the middle console. Her skin feels smooth and soft against mine. “Your dad is seriously hilarious. I can see where you get your humor,” I say, stealing another glance at her.

She laughs. “Isn’t he the best?”

“Yeah, he really is, and your mum’s incredibly kind and fun too. You’re really lucky. You’ve hit the bloody jackpot with your parents.”

I feel her gaze on me, a steady warmth that I catch in my peripheral vision.

“You’re going to be a really great dad,” she says, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. “I have no doubt about it.”

A great dad. The thought hits me with a mix of excitement and sheer bloody terror. What if I fail? What if I fuck it all up?

But then I look at Viv, her eyes brimming with trust and certainty. She believes in me. With her by my side, maybe I can become the dad I want to be.

“Thanks, babe,” I murmur, squeezing her hand. “I have no doubt you’ll be an incredible mum.”

“Ahh, can we move to London, so our kids will call me ‘Mum’ and have an adorable British accent?” she teases, grinning at me.

Chuckling, I pull into the driveway and shift the car into park. Bringing her hand to my lips, I kiss it softly, feeling the warmth of her skin, then look at her adoringly. “Babe, you’re so close to your parents. Are you thinking about raising the baby here, near them? You know, for their support and everything?” The faint smell of Vivian’s perfume mixed with something uniquely her hangs in the air, and the distant chirping of crickets sounds in the background.

“I don’t know,” she says, leaning back in her seat and resting her head. She turns to look at me. “I think about it a lot, but I haven’t really focused on being here because you were always in the picture. Your life is in Chicago, and part of mine is there too. I’d never want to uproot your life just for me.”

I squeeze her hand gently. “I know you wouldn’t, but I’d move for you… for our family,” I reply, my voice steady and sincere.

“I know, and that’s why I love you, but I can’t ask that. You have your work, your clients, Meredith, and all your other friends—they’re your family.”

“But I’m not starting a family with them, babe. They’re not my future. You are, and this baby is.” I pause, feeling the weight of my words as I say things I never thought I’d say, and consider the possibility of living here. “Do you think your father-in-law would sell this house?”

Her eyes widen with surprise. “You’d want to buy it?”

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