Page 49 of If It Can't Be Us

“Of course I do. Friends talk about these things, don’t they?”

“Yeah, I guess they do.” She hesitates a moment, gathering her thoughts. “It just feels different now, talking about this with you.” Keeping her gaze straight ahead, she continues, “But it was good. I actually had a lot of fun with him. He was nice and funny, our personalities clicked, and the conversation flowed easily…” I listen, taking in her words. “And… he’s a good kisser,” she adds, her tone laced with deliberate sharpness.

I raise an eyebrow, a teasing grin forming on my lips. “Oh, so you got on base then?”

She laughs softly, shrugging her shoulders. “Maybe, maybe not.”

“I’m glad you had fun. You deserve that.”

Damn it, why does this bother me so much?

“Did you book your flight home for Christmas yet?” I ask, hoping to shift the topic.

“I did. The flights dropped last week right before Thanksgiving, so I snatched up a ticket. I’m going home December seventeenth to the thirtieth. I’m excited to see my friends and my parents.”

“That’s great, so you’ll be home for Mer’s New Year’s Eve party? You’re planning to come still, yeah?”

“Yes, I’m planning to come. That’s why I’m coming home on the thirtieth.” She bends down to tie her shoe, a slight sigh escaping her lips. “I don’t have anywhere else to go. Do you wanna run?” she asks, standing and looking down the Riverwalk, her breath visible in the chilly air.

“Yeah, we can run.” We set a comfortable pace, running side by side. The cold bites at my face, and while I enjoy cooler temps for running, it’s pushing my limits. I usually avoid running outdoors once the temperatures drop below the thirties, and it’s probably mid-thirties right now.

We run in silence for a good half mile, the sounds of our breathing and feet pounding on the sidewalk blending with the city’s hum. Each exhale forms a misty cloud before dissipating into the crisp morning air. It’s Sunday, so we pass an occasional runner, but it’s mostly quiet and still. The moon’s reflection shimmers on the river, casting a light that contrasts with the city’s distant murmur. It’s peaceful, and one of my favorite ways to start a morning.

She breaks the silence. “When is the fall semester over?” Her concentration remains unbroken as she stares straight ahead.

“In a week and a half, December sixth.”

“Wow. I didn’t realize you got done so soon. That’s great that you get the whole month of December off.”

“It is great. I’m thinking of going to London the day after the semester ends, for a week. I was going to look at flights today. My brother and his wife just had their first baby a few days ago, so I’m officially an uncle.” A smile spreads across my face at the thought. “I’m so happy for them. I want to go meet my new niece and see the two of them; it’s been a few months since I’ve been back.” I pause to catch my breath.

She looks at me with a smile that reaches her eyes. “Oh my gosh, you’re an uncle! That’s so exciting! Why didn’t you tell me your brother was going to have a baby? I didn’t even know he was married.”

“It wasn’t intentional, it just never came up.”

We reach our halfway point and turn around, the city skyline looming ahead.

“Still… that’s a big deal, a big thing in your life.” She grabs ahold of my elbow and slows us to a walk. “Seriously, Leo. I tell you everything. Why don’t you ever talk about your family or London?”

I gesture forward. “Let’s keep running, this isn’t the time to dive into that.” I sprint forward, only to be pulled back and slowed by her.

“Come on, give me something. It’s your home and what makes you—you. I want to know about your family, and your life growing up there.”

I lace my fingers behind my head, taking a deep breath. “You know how it took you months to open up to me about Ben?”

She nods, her expression softening. “Yeah.”

“Well, this is like that. I don’t want to talk about it right now, so please respect that, and stop pushing.” My voice is clipped, harsher than I intended. She’s taken aback, her eyes widening in shock and hurt. I soften. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out that way.”

She’s clearly upset, but nods in understanding. “Okay. Yeah, I get it, I’m sorry for pushing. I just want to understand you.” Her voice is quiet, laced with sincerity and a hint of sadness.

“I know. And I love that about you.” I give her a half smile. “C’mon, let’s keep running.”

We pick our pace back up. “What’s her name? Your niece,” she asks.

“Emma. Emma Jones Weston. My brother’s wife’s last name is Jones.” I can’t help but smile, thinking about my brother and his family. “I’ll show you a picture of her when we get back. She’s adorable and so tiny.”

I glance at her, a surprised look on her face. “I didn’t know you were so fond of babies.” She playfully nudges me. “Look at you, having a soft side I didn’t know about. Have you ever wanted kids of your own?” She’s still prying… poking—albeit subtly, not about my family but families in general.

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