Page 29 of The Surgeon's Secret

After he finished eating, James disappeared into the study, leaving Catherine to clean up in silence. She stood in the kitchen, washing dishes mechanically, her mind racing with thoughts she could never voice.

In the quiet of the house, Catherine finally allowed herself to acknowledge the truth: her marriage was over. Not because of one betrayal, but because it had never truly existed in the first place. It had always been a shadow of what it could have been, built on the false pretense that she was enough to sustain it. But she wasn't enough—not for James, and not for herself.

The realization hit her hard. She couldn't keep living this lie, pretending that she was content when she was drowning in neglect and loneliness. But the fear of confronting him paralyzed her. What would happen when she finally told him that the loveshe once had for him had withered away? And what if she told him everything and he didn't even care?

She had tried to tell him a couple of times now. And her feelings had been met with the same cold dismissal. As though he never believed she would actually leave him.

Was he right?Did she really believe she would actually leave him?

Catherine didn't have all the answers. All she knew was that she couldn't keep living this way—not anymore. But for now, all she could do was wait, trapped in the silence of their marriage, holding on to the hope that someday, somehow, she would find the courage to break free.

As the days passed and James continued his absence in their marriage, Catherine's perspective began to shift. Every time James came home, it was like they were living in parallel lives, only momentarily converging at the edges of their existence. His long hours, his constant traveling, and his lack of attention to anything outside of his own world left Catherine feeling like an afterthought.

When they were together, the silence between them was deafening. He would speak of surgeries, cases, conferences—his world, his universe—and she would nod, pretending to still be part of the life they'd once shared. But with every passing moment, the distance between them grew wider, the gulf that had always been there now too vast to ignore.

Despite her clarity about the state of her marriage, Catherine's guilt about her affair with Lexi was suffocating. Each moment they spent together, each stolen kiss, had furthercomplicated Catherine's feelings, creating a tangle of emotions she couldn't easily unravel.

With Lexi, she didn't feel invisible. She felt seen, heard, and wanted. But as much as she cherished their moments together, she couldn't shake the responsibility she had to James. They were still married, and Catherine couldn't silence the voice that reminded her of the vows she'd made.

Catherine couldn't bear the thought of losing everything—her marriage, her career, her reputation—and yet, she couldn't keep living a lie. Every day felt like a balancing act, each step carefully calculated, every moment weighted with the knowledge that one misstep would bring it all crashing down.

15

LEXI

Lexi sat at the small kitchen table in her apartment, staring blankly at the half-empty cup of coffee in front of her. The steam rising from it should have been comforting, but it only made her feel more isolated, like she was trapped in a fog of her own emotions. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a peaceful moment, a time when her mind wasn’t racing with questions and doubts.

Lately, her whole life felt like it was unraveling. She deeply cared for Catherine, but the constant secrecy of their affair was eating away at her. It was like they were two strangers meeting in dark corners, unable to exist in the light of day. She was always the “other woman,” always the one hidden from the world, and it was suffocating. There were moments when she wondered if she would ever get to be more than a fleeting moment in Catherine’s life. The pain of it—the constant ache of being kept in the shadows—was wearing her down.

She had known this. She had known in the first place that letting herself get too deeply involved with Catherine was a terrible idea. But, despite everything, she hadn’t been able to resist falling in love with her.

Lexi’s mind kept drifting to the first time she’d truly felt the depth of her feelings for Catherine. It had been so unexpected, so intense, that she’d barely been able to keep herself together. She hadn’t gone into their friendship with any ulterior motive. But the chemistry was undeniable—the way Catherine’s touch lingered just a little longer than necessary, the way her eyes softened when they spoke about things that mattered. Over time, that connection had deepened into something more, something she couldn’t ignore.

And now it was destroying her. Catherine was still married. Despite saying she would leave him, she still hadn’t. The reality of it had settled in after weeks of stolen moments and secret rendezvous. Lexi didn’t want to be the other woman. She didn’t want to feel like a secret, something Catherine hid away like a shameful indulgence. Lexi didn’t mind being the person Catherine turned to when things were bad, when James was gone again or Catherine felt lonely and isolated in her marriage. What she couldn’t stand anymore was the constant reminder that she was nothing more than an escape, someone to be enjoyed in fleeting moments but never in the light of day.

She loved Catherine. But she couldn’t keep pretending that was enough.

The guilt gnawed at her, too. Every time she saw Catherine with James, wearing her well-practiced smile as she played the role of the supportive wife, Lexi felt like an intruder in their life. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. She wasn’t supposed to feel like she was tearing apart someone else’s world. But she did, every single day. And it was killing her, piece by piece.

In the beginning, when their connection was still new, she’d convinced herself that Catherine was telling the truth when she said she would leave her husband. How could she not? James was a consultant surgeon, always busy with cases that took him around the world. He was charming, yes, but distant. She wasdeeply unhappy with him. The marriage seemed to be nothing more than an arrangement—a partnership that worked because they both allowed it to stay that way. Lexi had imagined that Catherine could see that, and then she would choose something real.

But Catherine hadn’t. She’d stayed. And as the days turned into weeks, and the weeks into months, Lexi started to question if she ever would. It became more and more evident to her that Catherine, for all her dissatisfaction with her marriage, wasn’t willing to make the break. She wasn’t willing to risk everything for something that felt as unstable and uncertain as their secret relationship. The realization broke something inside of Lexi. She’d been patient and understanding for so long. But she was tired of waiting, tired of watching Catherine’s hesitation, tired of feeling like the other woman who would never be enough.

And then came the moment—the breaking point—when Lexi couldn’t take it anymore.

She’d tried to talk to Catherine and express how she felt, but the words never came out right. It wasn’t just about the affair; it was about her own worth, about feeling like she was worth choosing. She didn’t want to live in the shadows anymore.

One night, after Catherine left her apartment, the weight of her frustration became too much. She needed clarity. She needed to know where she stood, once and for all.

The day Lexi decided she couldn’t keep hiding anymore started like any other. She was at the hospital, her thoughts constantly drifting to Catherine, to the things they’d shared, the passion that warmed her chest every time she thought about the last time they’d been together. But today, the thoughts weren’t pleasant. They were laced with frustration, anger, and hurt. She couldn’t help it; they were boiling inside of her, and she knew she needed to act before they consumed her completely.

It wasn’t even about the affair itself—it was what the affair symbolized. The lies. The deceit. The constant strain on her own heart as she tried to find some way to make it all work while Catherine remained stuck.

Lexi had been patient and understanding, even though the situation wasn’t ideal. But she knew, deep down, that she couldn’t keep living like this. The constant waiting, the quiet desperation that gnawed at her when Catherine couldn’t—or wouldn’t—choose her, was starting to feel like too much. And as much as she loved Catherine, Lexi couldn’t keep pouring her heart into something that had no future.

She couldn’t hold back anymore.

After a long day at the hospital, Lexi didn’t go home right away. She needed to see Catherine and get some answers. Her mind raced with everything she planned to say. It had to be now. No more waiting. No more pretending.

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