Page 32 of California Wild

Just… should.

She could feel the lie in his voice.

Could feel his walls slamming into place.

And she was so goddamn tired of it.

She crossed her arms, staring him down. “You always do this.”

Jesse’s jaw tightened. “Do what?”

She gestured between them, exasperated. “Say things you don’t mean. Act like you don’t care when we both know you do.”

His expression hardened. “What do you want me to say, Hayley?”

“I don’t know. The truth?”

His head tipped back slightly, a sharp, humorless laugh escaping. “You think the truth changes anything?”

“I think it’s better than whatever the hell this is.”

Jesse exhaled, dragging a hand through his hair, his whole body tensing like he was about to snap.

Then—he did.

“Alright. You want the ugly truth?” His voice came low and sharp, eyes burning into hers. “Fine. But none of this will surprise you. I lost myself after you left. I lost everything. I fucked up bad. People didn’t trust me. Hell, I didn’t trust me.”

Hayley’s breath hitched, but Jesse wasn’t done.

“And you? You were the one good thing in my life, and I threw it away because I was too goddamn selfish to realize what I had until it was too late.”

She opened her mouth, but he cut her off.

He continued, “I cheated on you, Hayley. Not once, not twice, but many times. You know. I was too high to understand what I was throwing away. Too drunk to realize how much I would regret it… forever. But, I did it. I hurt you. And I’m fucking so damn sorry.”

His chest rose and fell rapidly, his anger like a live wire beneath his skin.

But it wasn’t just anger.

It was frustration. Hurt. Longing.

“But guess what? None of that changes anything. Yeah, I went to therapy. I got sober. I fought for my job, my life, being clean. I fucking did the work. And still—here we are.”

Silence settled between them, heavy and aching.

Then, after a long pause, Jesse’s voice dropped, lower now. Rough around the edges.

“I’ll never win your trust back.”

Hayley felt something sharp twist in her chest. “Jesse…”

“You shouldn’t trust me again.” His fists clenched at his sides, his whole body vibrating with restraint. “The best we can do is be friendly and stay loosely in touch—not because it’s healthy, but because I just don’t want a life where you are not in my life at all.”

Hayley sucked in a breath.

She should say something.

She should break this moment before it swallowed her whole.

---