Page 177 of California Wild

“I walked down the wrong alley.”

“Jesus, Jesse.” She sat up slightly, sheets falling to her waist, her voice rising with disbelief. “Why would you do that? Why wouldyou be out in some alley when you were supposed to be—” She broke off, swallowing hard. “You were supposed to meet me.”

He exhaled, the sound low, gritty. “I didn’t mean to disappear.”

“But you did.” Her voice was sharper now, more awake. “I called you. I waited.”

His jaw ticked.

She stared at him, heart pounding. “What happened to you out there?”

His hand flexed against the mattress. “I was looking for someone.”

The words stilled her.

“A friend,” he added, voice low. “Kwilé. He’s on the street. He’s an addict. He’s been using again. I hadn’t seen him in days—I thought he might be dead.”

That stopped her.

Because she understood.

Her breath left her in one slow, aching exhale.

“I would’ve gone with you,” she whispered.

He looked at her like that thought never even occurred to him.

And maybe it hadn’t.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked. “Why do you always try to carry everything alone?”

Jesse shifted, wincing as the bandage pulled across his ribs. “Because I don’t know how not to.”

“Then learn,” she said, voice trembling. “Because I can’t keep doing this. I’m not that girl anymore. I can’t keep loving someone who disappears when I need him.”

The silence between them stretched wide and taut, pulling across the bed like wire.

He reached for her again. This time she let him.

His fingers ghosted along her jaw, brushing a tear she hadn’t realized had fallen. His thumb stayed there, warm and rough and trembling ever so slightly.

“Hayley.” His voice was barely a breath. “I love you.”

Her eyes closed.

And when they opened again, they were brimming with tears.

“If that’s true…” Her throat bobbed. “Then let me in.”

Silence.

Thick and suffocating.

She could hear it—the beat of his heart in the quiet. Could feel how badly he wanted to say something. To fix this. To explain.

“I am trying,” he said.

She nodded once, swallowing. “I know.”

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