Page 21 of Short Stack 3

I’m struck dumb. I can’t help it. You try sleeping with Jude Jacobs and see if you have the same reaction. I’m pretty sure that I’m drooling as his jumper and jeans come off, leaving his golden-skinned body lithe and nude in the gathering shadows of the room. I come back to myself when his briefs hit me in the face.

“Get a move on, Asa,” he commands. “Or I’ll start without you.”

Jude

I come awake to the sound of my phone ringing. Putting one hand out of the duvet, I grope around for it and answer with my eyes still closed. “Hello,” I say sleepily.

“Jude,” comes the excited, high voice of Billy.

“Hello, you,” I say affectionately.

There’s a pause. “It’s Billy,” he says painstakingly.

I repress a smile. “Oh, is it? I thought it was King Charles.”

“Is he inFrozen?”

I wrinkle my forehead. “No,” I say slowly. “He’s the king.”

“What king?”

“The King of England.”

“Oh.” He sounds disappointed. “Has Disney made any films about him, then?” He’s currently obsessed with Disney films because Gabe bought the Disney Channel for him. Dylan and I find it highly amusing to watch the worldly Gabe forced to sit with Billy while they discuss very seriously what animal they’d be in the films.

“Not likely. His ears would take over the screen,” I say and then immediately want to smack myself around the head.

“Oh.” He suddenly sounds excited. “Does he have elephant ears like Dumbo?”

“Not quite,” I say carefully. I’ve broken my rule of not being flippant with Billy, and now I must accept the consequence, which is going to be a very long and earnest discussion about King Charles and his ears. Luckily for me, this time, he changes the subject.

“You’ll never guess what.”

“You’ve started a new job with Father Christmas. You’re going to pull his sleigh.”

There’s a hearty little-boy chuckle. “No, silly,” he says. “Uncle Henry is here, and he’s going for a walk with me.”

I blink. “Well, that’s lovely,” I say slowly. I pause. “Hang on. Uncle Henry is going for awalk?”

“Yes. He’s promised to take me. Why do you sound surprised?”

“Well, Uncle Henry isn’t known for enjoying walking.”Unlessit’stohistailorsorthepub, I add silently.

“Who doesn’t like walking?” Billy says in a tone of utter incomprehension.

“Iknow,” I say with feeling. I bite my lip as a wicked thought occurs to me. “You know, I think it would make him really happy if you took him for a very long walk on the farm.”

“Really?” Billy says.

I nod, unable to repress my evil smile. “Oh, yes. And he loves mud, so make sure you take him onto the west field where the cows normally are.”

“He might get cow poo on his shoes,” my darling little boy says doubtfully. “He didn’t like it when he got sand on his trainers last year.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’ll be fine,” I say airily. “Don’t forget to make it a nicelongwalk, Billy.”

“Okey-dokey,” he says cheerfully. “Love you.”

“Love you too,” I say and smile as I click to end the call.

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