Page 85 of Sumanika

I nodded silently, and she smiled, gently touching my head.

"Come with me,"

She didn’t ask me to wear anything but bangles. I took the dupatta and adjusted it over my brow. Honestly, I felt nothing—absolutely nothing. Not even a hint of excitement. I knew where I belonged, even if the doors were closed.

I walked out with her to a meeting hall where couches were arranged throughout the space. I noticed a tall man standing as we arrived.

"Please, be seated," Daadisa said, and I helped her sit down on the couch. She held my hand, pulling me closer to sit beside her.

I remained silent as they began to speak.

"Pranam, Rajmata," I heard a deep voice, and Daadisa replied, "Pranam, Bhan Singh." She turned slightly towards me. "This is Suman," I couldn’t help but bring my palms together to greet him.

"Ji, Pranam," he responded slowly, and I heard a woman beside him ask Daadisa a few questions about me, to which she replied politely. Daadisa was a humble woman; she knew that if she ordered him to marry me, he would, but she wanted the best for me. That’s why she was putting in extra effort to build this relationship.

And suddenly, she said, "Suman, take him inside and ask him whatever you want to." My eyes widened in shock, and I sat in silence, immobile.

She elbowed me a little, and I gulped nervously, standing up. He also stood, and I clenched my fists, silently walking inside, hearing his footsteps follow me.

I looked around to see if Kunwarsa Agsatya was there. I didn’t know if he was too angry to do anything.

"Umm, are you comfortable?" I heard him ask slowly, and I turned to look at him, nodding slowly.

"Please, have a seat," I managed to say, gesturing towards the couch as I watched him sit down.

There was a long pause before he began.

"Um, are you happy with this marriage?" he asked in a quiet voice, and I bit my lip nervously.

"Please, sit down; you don’t have to keep standing," he added, and I walked over to the other couch across from him and sat down.

"I have to tell you something," I managed to say, but my voice came out slow and a bit hoarse. The heat Kunwarsa Agastya had left me with still warmed my head, and I felt a slight soreness between my legs, making me shift a little on the couch.

"Yes?" he prompted, his voice slow as well. I clenched my hands to gather my strength and managed to say slowly, "I can’t marry you."

There was a long, awkward silence until he asked, his tone upset, "Oh, why? If you’re comfortable answering."

I blinked nervously. "I’m already tied to someone," I said, trying to keep my gaze steady. He frowned in confusion.

"Married?" he asked. I swallowed hard and shook my head.

"Not exactly," I replied.

"Will you keep this between us and deny the marriage? I can’t because I respect Daadisa a lot, and I can’t tell anyone about it," I added, my voice trembling and struggling to find the right words.

He nodded.

"I will," he said. I inhaled deeply.

"When my first husband died, his family tried to force me to burn myself along with his body as part of a ritual in our tribe. But a man saved my life; to do so, he had to put vermillion in my hair. I mean, we aren’t properly married, but I’m tied to him in a way that I wouldn’t be able to find peace in my heart if I even think about anyone else."

My voice came out slowly, and he remained silent for a moment. My heart raced, and he said in a slow voice, "But I wouldn’t have a problem with it."

I gulped nervously now and shook my head.

He didn’t have a problem with it, but I knew Kunwarsa would, and I had a problem. I couldn’t fool him when I was falling for Kunwar Agastya.

"You don’t understand. I can’t marry anyone," I managed to say, and he inhaled deeply, remaining silent for a moment.