Page 47 of Sumanika

So what was she worried about? Was it about me talking to her?

She didn’t seem unhappy while talking to me; she only appeared irritated, which I liked because it distracted her from the past. Now she was doing better. She seemed more engaged in her work and didn’t need me as much. My teasing and irritation also distanced her from me, which was actually beneficial for her.

At that moment, a relationship was the most harmful thing for her. Thus, I perceived my disloyal reputation and flirting as somewhat useful. This meant that if she continued to get annoyed with me, she wouldn’t develop feelings for me.

However, something felt really off about her today.

I returned from the Authority of Letters and lay on my bed, trying to sleep. However, I couldn’t, as thoughts of her battles and struggles swirled in my mind. I meant a woman who had been forced, then abandoned, and not truly allowed to live happily. How could anyone expect her to forget and be happy so easily?

No matter how much you run, a part of your past always runs behind you.

I palmed my face, unable to catch sleep, and finally gave up.

After taking a quick bath, I started writing letters to all the guests for the baby’s sixth-day feast. However, in the back of my mind, I couldn’t shake the image of that day when she was crying in my arms and then her rigidity to live as a normal woman. It just wouldn’t leave my mind, and it was hindering me.

After finishing the letters, I stepped outside to check on the preparations. Yet, unconsciously, my eyes searched for her. In the kitchen, I scanned all the women: short frame, wheatish skin, wavy curly hair, a big smile, beautiful red lips, a mole on her right cheek, and another on the left side of her neck. She wore two red bangles on each wrist, had a tiny waist with a slight belly, and would show her frustration at noticing me nearby.

But as the sun sank below the horizon, the winds turned chilly, the insects emerged, and the birds returned to their nests, but I could not find her.

With each passing moment, my heart beat a little faster at the thought of all the potential things that might have happened to her, rendering her unavailable.

What if she got hurt, sick, tense, depressed, or crying? Oh no! No, no… that couldn’t happen.

As evening descended, I returned to my chamber. Rubbing my face, I sank into the couch and pondered ways to find her.

Did she go to visit her family? Still, there was no letter.

Suddenly, a thought popped into my mind, and I clapped twice. An attendee walked in, and I looked at her.“I want dinner,” I said, and she nodded before leaving me.

She would come now.

I reminded myself to take a quick bath and change into my night clothes: a simple long loincloth and a loose white kurta. After my bath, I settled back onto the couch and began waiting once more.

However, time appears to move more slowly now.

I gazed at my dagger impatiently, beginning to draw it from the sheath only to push it back in. My eyes studied it intently, yet my mind remained fixated on the image of her face I had seen just before she fled.

When I heard footsteps approaching, I immediately lifted my gaze to the entrance. A slight smile appeared on my face, but as soon as I saw an attendee, I felt an unfamiliar ache in my heart.

“Prince, dinner.”

“Take it back,” I replied faster than I anticipated, glancing at the puzzled attendee retrieving the plate.

I bit my lower lip in confusion. Maybe she was busy and didn’t realize I had asked for dinner, so she didn’t come. I stood up and pulled out a book to pass the time. I started with the first word of each page and promised myself that I would call for dinner when I finished the first page.

I started reading, but I was hardly focused. I managed to finish the page and then clapped again.

Another attendee arrived.“I want dinner now,” I requested, remaining polite, as I had already been rude to someone else. She bent down and nodded before leaving.

After trying to concentrate for a while, I noticed footsteps. I gulped and looked toward the entrance, and as soon as I saw the face, I sighed in frustration.

I will kill you today. Half wife.

“Take it back, I’m not hungry,” I blunt, and the attendee looked at me with a confused and scared expression.“But, Pr—”

“Really, I’m not hungry,” I insisted, and she turned to take it back.

Fine! This time, I would read five pages. I sat down on the couch and immersed myself in the next five. As soon as I finished the last word of the fifth page, I clapped twice. An attendee approached.“I want dinner,” I stated again. She nodded before leaving.