Page 137 of Sumanika

I clenched my hands tightly on my skirt and lifted my feet to step into the pool. His expression shifted from confusion to shock.

His eyes widened as I let the water soak my skirt. I lowered myself to sit beside him.

He gazed into my eyes while I pressed my back against the pool wall, pulled my knees close to my chest, and took a deep breath to steady my racing heart.

I gulped nervously and rested my head on his shoulder, saying,“My head hurts too.”

I felt his body relax under my touch as he tilted his head against mine. I looked at him, intertwining our hands before closing my eyes.

Finally, it felt peaceful and comforting.

Sitting beside him, I exhaled deeply and tried to concentrate on my breathing. The water temperature dropped from high to low, and the oil in the lamps burned against the emptiness to brighten the world. But sadly, when night arrived, no light could bring the brightness back.

“Maybe I should have hidden that from you. I can’t stand seeing you in pain,” he muttered slowly. I opened my eyes and looked at our hands. The skin was turning pale from the cold water, freezing us slowly, and I bit my lips, preparing to speak.“Maybe, but hearing it from someone else would have hurt me even more,” my voice came out slowly. He responded,“No one can come between us, Suman, if you accept me as your husband.” Hearing his low, hoarse voice, I lowered my gaze and shook my head.

"What if I am not enough for you," I asked in a slow voice, and he chuckled suddenly.

"Pagal ho tum?""Are you mad?"

I thinned my brows with confusion and turned to look at him a little.

"Jo bhi ho, jitni bhi ho, ab tum hi ho, Maang to bhar di hai na. Vikalp nahi hai hamare pass,""You are the only one now. However you are, whatever it may be, I do not have options," He said in a slow voice, and I tried to ask in a slow voice. "What if you had options?"

He lowered his gaze, kissed the back of my hands, and muttered.

"Pata hai, bahut himmat lagti hai jab aap apne jeevan ka vo bhaag kisi ko batate ho jisse aap khud kabhi nahi yaad karna chahte, jisse aap har roz door bhaagte ho or bachna chahte ho. Tumhari Kasam, Suman, dobara kisi ko nahi bata paenge, itni himmat nahi hai. Or ab to ye ummeed bhi nahi hai ki koi samjhe kyuki samajhne layak nahi rahe hum ab,"“You know, it takes a lot of courage to share that part of life you can’t remember, the part you run away from every day. I swear, Suman, I will never have the strength to tell anyone this again; I just don’t have the courage left. And I’ve accepted that no one would understand because it doesn’t even provide anything worth understanding.” His words made my heart heavy, and I lowered my gaze in silence, unable to respond.

“Then why did you tell me?” But I couldn’t stop myself from asking.

He inhaled deeply and brushed my hand with his thumb while saying."Patni ho, hak or jaruri bhi hai tumhara jaanna ka,""You are my wife; it's your right and the necessity to know,"

I did not know, but it brought a slight smile, and I turned to look at him. "I have not accepted you yet,"

He smiled weakly.

"And you are so unpredictable and confusing," I added, furrowing my brows, and he asked.

"How?"

"One moment you say you can leave me, and the next, you call me your wife," I said, and he sucked on his lips and replied slowly.

“For me to call you my wife is my reality, and you have the right to make your own choices; your life is your right. No one can stop you from saying you don’t want to see me, or that you want to forget me, or that you wish to live alone or marry someone else. That’s your right, but I am not backing out of my responsibilities or my feelings,” His words resonated with me, and I didn’t know why, but hearing him made me feel lighter. It was as if he was lifting some weight off my chest, and I tried to ask. "So, what happens if I marry someone else?"

He furrowed his brows and raised his face to look at me with questioning eyes.“Are you having an affair?” I quickly shook my head, my eyes widening in shock as I tried to say,“Are you crazy? No!” He leaned in closer.“Just joking. I’ll be happy for you,” he said in a slow voice, suddenly raising his pitch.

“But that man has to keep you happy. I mean, there’s no way he would ask you to cook after having sex and make you cry,” he said, and I chuckled.

"You cannot keep eyes on him,"

He shook his head.“That’s where you are mistaken, Sumanika Ji. I can definitely keep an eye on him and take him out for hurting you, too.” He turned his gaze toward me, and I felt a shiver go down my spine when he mentioned killing my hypothetical husband.

"You need some treatment. I am not even married to someone else yet, and you are already killing him," I said and lowered my gaze. He leaned in closer and kissed my forehead.

“Just be happy. I don’t want anything else. I don’t need answers; I don’t want you to be with me if it makes you unhappy or makes you doubt yourself. No promises, no heartbreaks,” he said, and I gulped silently, leaning into his shoulder and muttering.

“I feel comfortable with you. I don’t know why. No man has ever made me feel this way. I can’t let go of this comfort,” I managed to say slowly, and it took a lot of courage to put that into words.

"I’m happy to be that," he said, and I lowered my gaze.