Page 9 of Fanatic

“Easily. Willow, I loved Grey, too. He’d have agreed with you taking a year to grieve. But Grey would have kicked your ass all over for keeping his son from family,” Fanatic said gently.

“They took Grey from me!” I exploded.

“Who did Willow?” he asked, genuinely puzzled.

“Your father. If your dad had ordered Grey to remain behind like the rest of the prospects, he’d be alive!” I hissed.

Fanatic shook his head. “Bit difficult ordering a man over thirty to stay behind. You knew full well Grey would defend the city. That’s who he was. Grey was a Fed for years, protecting the innocent was in him.”

“Shut up!” I ordered, but he was right.

Protect and Serve was as ingrained as Fidelity, Bravery, and Integrity. Fuck Fanatic. I bent to pick Danny up and saw he was gone. Fanatic now had him in his lap and was playing patty cake with him. Danny was frowning in concentration before breakinginto giggles. Fanatic’s expression softened as he kissed my son’s head.

Shit. Grey would kick my ass. Danny was missing out on so much, but I couldn’t return to Rapid City.

“So don’t,” Fanatic said.

“Huh?”

“Can read your face, Willow. You don’t want to return to Rapid City, so don’t. Have you forgotten there’s Deadwood, Piedmont, and Black Hawk, for example. Not that it matters, because I’ve rented a house in Spearfish. You’re coming home with me,” Fanatic explained as he held my gaze.

“You stuck-up English asshole!” I exclaimed, and Fanatic grinned.

“Babe, my accent ain’t exactly posh.”

“Shut up!”

“There she is. You can sulk and bitch while we walk back to your rental. Then start packing shit up. I’ve brought my SUV. We can pack it to the gills, and I’ve got the roof rack and a trailer to fill with your stuff.”

“You can’t storm in here and dictate what I’m going to do!”

“No? Babe, I don’t mind a few days R and R. You can pack, and Danny and I will do manly bonding. Gotta teach him how to blow spit bubbles and fart on command,” Fanatic replied.

I was unsure how to respond. Fanatic sat up and held my eyes.

“You’re hurting, Willow. You’ve been suffering for a year. And you ain’t alone in that. But you’re needed back at home. Axel lost someone he loved, as did Ellen, and your brothers lost Grey twice. A brother-in-law and a club brother. Grey’s mourned across the board. Hawthorne thinks if Grey had been with them, he’d be alive.

“Dad blames himself. But Grey was always going to walk his path. Fuck, Dad put Serenity on a plane, and yet she still managed to get involved,” Fanatic said.

At Serenity’s name, my face blanked.

Fanatic frowned.

“If she’d been in Camden, that Fang would have aimed elsewhere and not shot at Serenity. Grey wouldn’t have died saving her life. Don’t talk to me about Serenity,” I hissed.

Fanatic’s eyebrows disappeared into his hairline. “So, you blame Dad and my sister.”

“Yes. Drake should have ordered Grey away. And Serenity shouldn’t have been there. I can’t face them because I’m so angry, Fanatic. I love you; you’re my best friend, but fuck them. Danny’s growing up fatherless because of those two. Grey didn’t even know I was pregnant,” I said loudly.

I drew some attention of people walking past, and I glowered. “Problem?” I hissed.

They looked quickly away.

“Do you blame me? I should have been at Grey’s side. What about you? You were his partner for years. Willow, you’d have been able to read Grey’s body language.”

“Yes, I’m responsible too! If I’d quit the FBI, Grey would have been with my team and safe!”

“Keep going down that rabbit hole, Willow,” Fanatic taunted.