Page 111 of Dirty Grovel

“High praise.” I incline my head towards her in thanks. “But despite your confession, I still don’t think you’re to blame for?—”

“That’s because you don’t know the whole story,” she interrupts, her face falling slack again. “I knew I had terrible judgement. I knew I made bad decisions, especially when I was emotional. And still, I kept roping Sutton into all my plots and schemes to bring Paul to heel.”

“You really thought that was possible.”

“Didn’t I preface this confession by saying I was naïve?”

I hold up a hand. “Forgive me. Continue.”

Her lips twitch upwards. “Basically, I convinced myself that Paul was malleable enough to manipulate. I felt sure that I could wear him down. I’d invested so many years in him already. Giving up and leaving without a thing felt like a defeat. I was sure that, if he just saw my potential, we could be real partners. In life and in business. I always had the head for it. And now—” She pauses, her eyes growing distant. “—oh, God, now, he doesn’t have a head at all.”

At first, I think she’s sobbing. But when her hands come away from her face, I realize she’s laughing.

Hysterically.

Tears pour down her face as she stammers out words I can’t make head or tail of.

“I-I… I’m sorry,” she guffaws, wiping her face with her napkin. “I… d-don’t know… what’s gotten into me…”

“You’re still in shock,” I explain calmly.

She hiccups, her laughter dying all of a sudden. She blinks at me, her nostrils flaring. “I know I seem like it, but I’m not insane.”

“I believe you.”

“You know the worst part?” She gazes out of the window again. “Even after she had the courage to do what I never could and leave the abusive relationship, I gave her all the wrong advice. I told her to find another rich man who would take care of her. And to make matters worse, I just stood by and watched Paul treat Sutton like shit.”

“He seemed to have a bone to pick with her,” I growl, white knuckling my chair.

“He felt she was a bad influence. Firstly, she had left Drew and he was worried that I would do the same. And she would always step in and defend me if he treated me badly in her presence. And after all that, when he called her awful things, I just stood there, mute and terrified, because I knew that sticking up for Sutton now would mean a beating later.”

What I wouldn’t give to bring that fucker back from the dead, just so that I can kill him again.

Except this time, I’d make sure to kill him slowly.

Sydney whimpers. “That was one of the reasons why I convinced her to do that boudoir shoot.” She gives me a self-conscious glance. “You saw that shoot, right?”

I stiffen. “Yes, I saw it.”

She sighs. “It wasn’t just about Sutton. I did want to make her feel better about herself. But it was self-serving, too. Paul was fucking his latest hire at his strip club and I was insecure. I thought a boudoir shoot would get his attention and make him forget his bimbo. Two birds with one stone.” She snorts derisively. “It was a stupid fucking idea. I should have known that you don’t throw good money after bad men.”

“So… Anton had nothing to do with the boudoir shoot then?” I ask quietly.

Her eyes flit to mine. “Of course not. Why would he have? They were long done by that time. Sutton was doing it forme. I don’t know how it happened, but somewhere down the road, our roles reversed. She became the big sister, the mature one, the strong one. I always thought I would be the one to look after her. But in reality, it’s the other way around.”

“It doesn’t have to be one way or the other, Sydney. You can look out for each other.”

“How?” she whispers. “I have nothing to my name.”

“You have your wits and your brain. That’s more than enough.”

Sydney smiles shyly, sadly.

It’s damn near heartbreaking to see someone who doesn’t see the good in themselves.

“I can see why my sister fell for you, Oleg.”

I smile back as best as I know how to do. “Get some sleep. When you wake up, we should be in Palm Beach. Then you can see your sister.”