Page 132 of Flame and Sparrow

“In short? They want you banished from this realm, disqualified from ascension and sent to Eligas to waste away as punishment. They claim it’s because Mai helped you at the end of your last trial—yes, she admitted as much to me while you were off in the mortal realm—but it’s more complicated than that. The fact that you two cheated just gives them something definite to sink their claws into.”

He pointed to the fireplace, kindling it to life with a twist of his hand. He disappeared into the washroom after this, remerging several minutes later wearing clean clothing with his hair tied loosely away from his face.

I was in the same place he’d left me, staring into the fire while horrifying thoughts of being banished to the emptiness between realms played through my mind.

“It’s not because we cheated,” I thought aloud. “It’s because of what I am.”

He didn’t disagree. “The other courts don’t trust you, or the ones associated with you.”

“But you and your court do?”

He hesitated.

There was a knock at the door, and I jumped to my feet; I usually heard people coming, but I’d been too distracted to notice this one.

“Just a servant,” he informed me. He answered the knocking and returned a moment later holding two glasses in one hand, brandishing a bottle of crimson liquid in the other. “The wine you mentioned a need for earlier today.”

“Is that going to be enough, you think?”

He mirrored my sardonic smile. “I can always send for more.” He poured both glasses and handed one to me before settling into the chair next to the fire. “And to answer your previous question…it’s complicated.”

I snorted at this as I stayed on my feet, clutching my drink, trying to figure out what to say next. “So what happens now? They want me gone, but…”

“But I insisted they reconsider.”

“And?”

“They’ve left us alone, haven’t they?” His gaze took mine, flashing with that wild, red glow. His eyes looked even more hellish as they reflected the fire at my back.

A shiver crept over my skull and shot down my spine.

“Sorry we were ambushed like this.” He looked away from me until his eyes were back to their usual cool silver. “There have been rumblings from them, but I didn’t expect them to show up, ready to fight, as quickly as this. I should have prepared you better.”

“No need to apologize. I’ve been surrounded by fighting my entire life. I’m used to it.”

“All the same, this is not a normal occurrence. I’m a bit rattled by it myself, to be honest. By this and everything else we’ve been dealing with.”

“The trouble at the Edgelands, you mean?”

“Yes.” He took a long sip from his glass, leaning back in the chair, stretching his legs out, and lifting his eyes to the ceiling. He didn’t elaborate on that trouble. I think he would have if I’d asked—and I would ask, soon enough—but at the moment I didn’t want to.

I just wanted to look at him.

He was beautiful in the dim light, stretched out with all his muscular lines on full display, his head tipped back and the strands of his hair more red than blond in the fire’s glow. Vulnerable, yet powerful.

As I stared at him, a thought struck me—that what I’d told him was true. I really had been surrounded by fighting my entire life.

But I’d rarely experienced someone fightingforme the way he kept doing.

Andrel, Cillian, my father, even my sister…all their fierceness, all their countless, violent battles usually went back to thegreatercause. The bigger picture. The outstanding obligations. I’d been a part of that cause for so long that I’d almost forgotten I existed outside of it.

How strange that this god I once hated would be the one to remind me of my existence.

“You can disregard whatever you might have heard them say,” he told me, eyes still on the ceiling. “Our battle is not over, but you don’t have to leave this realm—not for Eligas or otherwise. You don’t have to go anywhere. Unless you want to, of course.”

My breath caught.

Unless you want to.

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