Page 50 of The Time Of Queens

But by then it would be too late.

I would be gone.

I tried to tell myself none of it mattered. That I had my own Draven back home, and in that time frame he loved me. He had fallen first for the girl I had been, and not the Electus Fate had claimed me to be. He really did love my snorts, my quirks, my clumsy ways. He loved my Christmas madness, my love of movies, my love of art, romance books, my obsession with tea, my love of pastries, my daft sense of humour.

But most of all, he loved me for me.

All of the good, the bad, and ugly that made me who I was. And had some terrible mistake been made and he woke one day to discover that I hadn’t been his Electus all along, it would make no difference to his loving me. He wouldn’t instantly cast me aside for another. He would have damned the Fates, before giving me up.

That was the love I wanted.

The love I deserved.

The love I had at home.

But more than that… it was the love I was trying desperately to get back to. Which was why I opened the door to find both Pip and Sophia standing there looking worried.

“I need that coin,” I told them, refusing to say anything else as my tears said enough.

“I went to look in his office but if there was one there, now it is gone.”

I staggered back at that, my hand going to my heart as I had been depending on one being there.

“Then I will go to London,” I said, my voice not wavering in my resolve.

“What? No, you can’t…” Sophia tried to argue, but I was quick to interrupt.

“I must. I can’t stay here.”

“My brother, he will calm down,” she argued back, making me shake my head.

“Yes, and we both know that whoever they think they have found will come to nothing,” Pip added, but I had already started to walk back into my room so as I could start packing my bag, stuffing what little I had here into it. A stolen life that was like stealing time.

“You don’t understand,” I told them both.

“Then explain it to us,” Sophia tried, the both of them stepping inside and closing the door the second they saw me trying to get out of this dress and back into my plain black one.

“Draven is picking his Electus over me, despite how he feels about me,” I told them, hoping this was enough for them to understand.Unfortunately, it wasn’t.

“But he doesn’t know who you are to him,” Sophia pressed on, making Pip agree with a nod of her head, before offering,

“Yes, and I could drop that if you like and then he will know…”

“NO! No… I don’t want that. I don’t want him to know. I don’t want him to ever know…” I said dejectedly, wiping my face as I could feel my emotions close to spilling from me again in the form of tears and a snotty nose.

“But why not?” Sophia asked with a shake of her head, making my shoulders slump.

“You don’t understand… I want… I want him to choose me not because Fate finally said, yes, you can have her,” I confessed, and finally Sophia’s expression turned to one of thoughtful understanding.

“You want him to choose you for love not fate,” she said, her voice near breaking for me.

“Yes. He chose wrongly and because of it, for the first time, he has given strength to my biggest fears.” I paused to take her hands in my own as I told her, “Please understand that I fell in love with your brother long before I knew who he was to me. But as for your brother… he has always known. So, which was it Sophia? Did he fall in love with the girl first or the Electus he knew me to be?”

At this she gripped my hands tighter and told me,

“I can’t answer that, Keira, I can only tell you of the character of my brother, and what I have seen these last few days is of a man in love, despite what you think. But that doesn’t mean heknows what to do with these feelings he has never experienced before. For ask yourself, would he be the first to fear love enough to make him walk away before realising his mistake?”

I turned my head away and told her,

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