Page 82 of War

“That was supposed to be an inside thought,” Hannah mutters.

Blue eyes locked on me, Tyler saunters in my direction, and the restof the world fades away. I’m pretty sure Hannah is squawking, but when Tyler is near, he’s all I can focus on.

He runs his fingers through my hair and tugs until my chin is forced up and I’m staring at that mouth of his as the most beautiful words fall from them.

“Tout ce à quoi je pense. C’est te faire l’amour à chaque instant de chaque jour. Comment tu goûtes. Comment tu parles. Je suis obsédé et te voir obsédé, C’est me foutre la tête. Ne me brise pas le cœur visqueux. Je ne m’en remettrai jamais.”

Before I can ask him to translate, his mouth is on mine, capturing me in the most indecent kiss I’ve ever experienced. I don’t need to know the meaning of his words to understand what he’s telling me. This isn’t a contractual relationship anymore. Though our initial reason is still important, it’s not all that binds us. This is so much more. It’s an obsession I can’t imagine waning.

Arms looped around his neck, I pull myself closer, giving in to my desires. This man. This freaking man may destroy me, and I may just let him.

“Holy shit, I need a cigarette,” Hannah mutters.

Even as I giggle and pull back, Tyler cradles my head and eases us apart. All the while, he presses kiss after drugging kiss to my lips, then my cheek, then my chin. Then he smiles that cocky smile that pisses me off so much. “Come on, wifey. We’re going to be late.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you.” Madi shakes my hand, and I’m immediately put at ease by her demeanor. She’s well-known around the country—she’s married to a famous actor, after all—so I wasn’t sure what to expect. But the petite brunette has a kind face, and I immediately like her.

“It’s nice to meet you too. Thank you for getting all the paperwork together so quickly.”

She points to the chairs across from her desk, signalingfor us to sit. “Of course. I think it’s wonderful that Josie helped bring her two favorite people together and that they fell in love.”

Keeping my expression neutral, I eye Tyler. Is that what he told her? That we fell in love and decided to get married on a whim after Josie introduced us? Honestly, it’s more far fetched than the already ridiculous truth—that we both love Josie and so we decided to get married in hopes that we can keep her.

Wouldn’t the court question our sanity if they believed that story? It’s not rational to fall in love that quickly. Then again, nothing we’ve been doing is rational.

“Also, I’m impressed by your willingness to put an agreement in place that establishes what happens should you separate. It shows just how important the well-being of the children is to you.”

Once again my eyes skirt to Tyler’s. This time, though, my stomach sinks. We did? Is he already planning our end?

Tyler grips my hand and squeezes. “What she means is the agreement that we’ll live together until Scarlett turns eighteen, no matter what. That we’ll put the kids first and raise them together because that’s what they need—both a mother and father who are dedicated to them. Not that there’s any kind of language in the contract regarding divorce.”

But maybe there should be. Maybe if we lay out what happens when we divorce, it’ll help me remember that this is all temporary. Then again, after years together, of being touched like this and aching for him like I already do, how will I ever recover when he walks away?

And he will walk away. Keeping the people who matter has never worked out well for me.

I clear my throat. “Yes, well, the kids come first. Always.”

Madi smiles. “Exactly. I can see why Tyler fell so hard so quickly. Finding someone with such similar values—especially when it comes to kids—is not easy, but it really is the foundation for a strong and long-lasting marriage. Now let’s go over everything so you two can get out of here.”

Hours later I’m still walking around in a fog. Tyler thought of everything. Every term in the contract protects the kids. Every question he asked was to ensure that we will do all we need to over thenext few months so that when social services interviews us and the court evaluates us, we’ll not only meet their expectations, but exceed them. He’s willing to do anything to become Josie’s father. That doesn’t take away from the attraction we’re navigating now. If anything, it makes me want him more. But it hit me hard. The realization that I’m not only incredibly attracted to him, but I’ve become incredibly invested in a future together.

I’d be smart to pull back. To give myself space to remember why we’re doing this. Maybe I should be scared, but how can I be, when I know that even if this part of our relationship comes to an end, Tyler will protect everyone—even me—so that we can make it as a family.

If anything, that frees me to explore the connection between us. We’re married. We’re attracted to one another. We have a contract in place to protect the kids should we decide we want nothing more than to be co-parents. If I keep my heart unattached, then I’ll be okay no matter how life plays out. It shouldn’t be too hard. The man drives me nuts 98 percent of the time. So this works. We’ll be married, we’ll raise our kids, and fool around.

How very Samantha of me.I slip my phone out of my pocket to text my sister. That thought would make her smile.

As I start down the hallway on the second floor, Josie’s little voice catches my attention, and my feet falter. Holding my breath, I pause outside her door.

“But what if it hurts?”

“Come on, fighter. You’re the strongest person I know.”

I peer into the bedroom, only to find Tyler sitting behind her on her purple and pink comforter, braiding her hair. He’s dressed in blue Bolts sweats and a white T-shirt, and she’s in her pajamas. The way he gently twists her hair and the way the tattoos on his arm flex as he does have a tightness growing in my chest.

“But what if it does? Everyone told me the needles wouldn’t hurt, but they did. It hurts, Tyler. They all lied.”

My heart breaks for our sweet girl. I know the pain of being jabbed with needles day in and day out. Of being aggravated when the nurses swear it won’t be that bad, yet don’t offer their arms instead.

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