Page 101 of Counterfeit Connection

I feel Griffin slide his hand over and grip my leg. He flexes his grip over and over again. Each pulse of his finger sends a wave of comfort through me, even though this situation is anything but.

“I don’t want Joseph’s face plastered next to…the others.”

“That won’t happen. I promise.”

“I hope that promise means more than the others you’ve made. Kaitlyn, please take me off speaker now.”

I glance over at Griffin and I can see the pain and embarrassment in his eyes. It hurts me just as much as all of this other bullshit.

I press the button on my phone to take her off speaker and press it to my ear. “Gilly…”

“Are you all right?”

“Honestly? No, not really.”

At this point, Griffin stands and begins his pacing again.

“You should come home. You don’t need to be there. It’s bad here, yes, but I can only imagine the severity with it right in his backyard.”

The thought of leaving Griffin makes me unhealthily upset and nervous. “No. No. I don’t want to do that. I want to be here with him.”

“Well, you can’t just hide in an apartment forever, Pixie.”

“What else can I do? How do I take the power back?”

“If I take my sister hat off and look at it objectively, which is really hard to do right now, I’d say, you both didn’t do anything wrong. Technically, you were outside, yes, but you were on a private balcony. You had the appearance of privacy. You were owed that. The more you hide, the more people can say you were ashamed to be together. If you’re so in love, show that. If you’re truly a couple, let them deny it. I do stand by my opinion you should be here and not there.”

I look over at Griffin. “Let us have time to talk about it. I don’t want to make a decision off of anyone else’s feelings but ours.”

Gillian sighs so close to a whimper. “I wish I could hug you.”

“You just did,” I whisper.

“I love you, Pixie. Call me if you need me. Day or night.”

“I love you too.”

I end the call and toss my phone back to the rug, opting to resist the urge to doom scroll.

“She’s really angry with me,” Griffin says.

“She is.” I nod.

“What was it you told her you would talk to me about?” He stops pacing and stands right in front of me.

“She thinks we can take our power back by doing the opposite of hiding. We should go out there and show everyone what we have is real.” I lean my head back on the sofa and stare up at the ceiling.

“Is that something you want?”

“I’m scared, but… she’s right. We can’t win by staying hidden.”

“It’s not about winning or losing. It’s about your safety and your mental health.” I can feel him stepping closer to me, then around me, until he’s behind the sofa, upside down in my view, looking at me. “I don’t know if I want to risk either of those things.”

“Do you still love me?” I ask him.

“Why would you ask me that? It’s the only thing I know to be true right now.”

“Then we need to show all of those assholes behind the cameras and keyboards this isn’t breaking me or us.”

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