Page 109 of Off Limits

I’d tried to ignore it, but it was no use. Every time we were on cam together felt real, like we were hooking up as Dex and Asa and not as Jake and Alex. And all the little touches we now shared weren’t helping. He’d been way more open around me since our talk a few weeks ago, and I loved how he didn’t hesitate to touch me and didn’t always wait for me to make the first move.

The more I tried to think of him as my friend and roommate, the harder it was to see him as anything other than the person I was falling for.

I’d tried to ignore it, tried even harder to stop it, but I was falling in love with Asa. And if I was being completely honest with myself, I was already there.

But I couldn’t tell him that, not when I wasn’t sure where he was. I knew he cared about me, and I’d go so far as to say he cared deeply about me, but did that translate to love?

It was messed up, but I wasn’t afraid of being rejected if I told him. It would sting if he didn’t feel the same, but it wouldn’t change my feelings for him. The thing that scared me was pushing him away by pressuring him for more if he wasn’t there.

“Yeah. If you want.”

He smiled shyly. “Yeah. That would be nice.”

“Are you tired?” I asked, opening the door to the bathroom.

We were usually too keyed up after a show to go right to bed, but I wasn’t really in the mood to watch anything.

“Yeah, it was a long day.” He followed me into the hall. “Did you want to go to bed early?”

“If you do.”

I hated how stilted the conversation was and how hard it was to talk about this kind of stuff with him. Things were way better when we talked about other stuff, but we still had issues telling each other what we wanted.

“I think I do.” He raked one hand through his hair. “Do you want me to meet you in your room when I’m ready?”

“Yeah. Sure.” I tapped on my leg absently. “See you in a few?”

“Yeah.” He shot me another shy smile and pointed to the bathroom. “I’ll go first.”

“I’ll go break down my room and put everything away.”

We stared at each other for a few beats, then took off in opposite directions.

It didn’t take long to put our camming equipment away, and by the time I was done in the bathroom, Asa was in my room and sitting on the edge of my bed.

I flicked off the light and closed the door. Asa pulled his hoodie off and lay down. I climbed into bed and settled next to him.

He immediately rolled into me and put his head on my shoulder. I wrapped my arm around him and held him tight.

“This is nice.” He rubbed his cheek against my chest.

“It is.” I cursed my stupid body as my dick went half hard.

We lapsed into silence.

“Why does this have to feel so good?” he whispered, then went stiff like he hadn’t meant to say that out loud.

“I don’t know,” I whispered back. “But it feels right.”

“Yeah.” He sighed softly. “It does.”

My chest squeezed, and I hugged him tighter. I couldn’t tell him I loved him, but maybe I could tell him a little of what I was feeling without spooking him.

“Asa?” I started, my voice coming out thick and raspy.

“Yeah?”

“I know this probably isn’t the right time to do this, but I need to tell you something.”

---