Page 27 of Choke

“Kendall, our information is on the website. My name, email, phone number.”

I see the guilt wash over her face. She didn’t even think of it.

I think back to how Adrian’s hand clamped down on my shoulder at the club, his grip firm enough to make me flinch. His voice had been steady and calm and made my blood run cold. I think this guy doesn’t take no for an answer. If he wanted to find me, he would. Judging by his facial expression last night, that pure, unadulterated rage, I don’t want to know what happens when he does.

And now, thanks to Kendall’s unintentional slip-up, he knows who I am.

Open Your Mouth

Adrian

The sky is dark, and heavy clouds threaten rain. It’s been a few days since I begrudgingly returned to Kingsport. I would have stayed in Torhaven longer, but I need to deal with the Alice situation, and I’m scheduled to work a couple of times this week. My job has perks, including a flexible schedule, but I need actually to show up to reap the benefits.

Traffic is light as I make my way across the city. A little more traffic might’ve been welcome, giving me longer to mentally prepare for what will probably be a blowout with Alice. She’d wanted to talk the day I came back. I avoided it, needing time to get my head on straight.

Based on what Ronan said, she’s going to ask about Lex. I’m not entirely sure how I will answer those particular questions. The only thing I know is that it’s time to end things. This was the last mess to handle during the fallout of the night last week. Nate and I had practice the day I came home, and both did an excellent job pretending nothing happened.

Brittney gave me a tongue-lashing, and I had to agree to make my Instagram account public as penance. I’m already up a few thousand followers, and she’s sent me a posting schedule that almost makes me regret punching Nate in a crowded bar.

Pulling into the driveway of the house Alice and I share, I realize this won’t be as clean as I had hoped. Her folks were well off, and when we moved in together, they’d given us a sizeable down payment for this place, but it was still ours. She’ll need to buy me out or sell it. I am not entirely in the position to walk away from the equity we built in thelast few years. Plus, the market had exploded, and this place was worth nearly double what we had paid.

Yeah, she’s going to hate me.

I wish I felt worse about that.

I shift the truck into park and flip down the visor. I look like shit: dark circles, overgrown beard—like I’m unraveling. I scrape a hand over my jaw, making a mental note to grab razors on the way back to the hotel. My eyes appear darker due to the dark circles formed over the last 6 days. Delaying this doesn’t benefit anyone, and I need to clear my head.

Movement ahead of me draws my attention, and I see Alice standing at the window. Regarding her appearance, I almost feel guilty for dragging her along for so long. After nearly two years of the guys criticizing me for looking for Lex, I met her. Alice is a lovely woman, but I’ve never been into nice, and Ronan has never dropped how incompatible we are. Since the bar fight, her mother has called me relentlessly. Her brother texted me to offer his two cents — a veiled attempt to encourage me to make up:

“My sister can be so dramatic, man. Kiss and makeup or whatever you do.”

I see her shift back and forth on her feet, eager for me to come inside. I turn the truck off, spit the gum I’m chewing into an empty coffee cup, and climb out of the truck. As I go to the door, the rain starts to fall.

Before I reach the top step, the front door swings open. Her eyes are full of apprehension and hope. This was the endgame for her. It was never the endgame for me. It was always for right now, one day at a time.

The house is warm, and she has so many candles burning. The aroma hits me instantly and makes my head hurt. She hesitates a little before leaning in to hug me. I wrap my arms around her soft curves tightly.

I’m sorry, Alice.

She ushers me into the living room and encourages me to join her on the couch. Wanting to keep a little space between us, I move to theloveseat. Her intentional choice shifts her expression of hope to what I can only assume is sorrow. We are silent for a few moments. Her eyes move from my face to her hands. She’s never been a strong, confident woman. I need to break the silence.

“Listen, Alice—” My voice comes out rough and low.

That’s all I manage before she breaks. Her back hunches inward, hands tangling in her hair, as her breath shatters into ragged gasps. Her sobs are loud, raw—the crying that doesn’t stop when you want it to.

Christ.

She’s also never been great at keeping her emotions in check.

“So what, Adrian? That’s it?” She sobs, her voice shaking so much I barely make out the words.

I search my brain for words that will soften the blow. That will make her stop making that awful whooping sound when she cries. Instead, I rise, move to the other couch, and put a hand on her knee, trying to reassure her that she will be okay.

Affirming my choice to keep my distance, she interprets this differently than I hoped. She lunges at me. Her mouth collides with mine, offering desperate, sloppy kisses.

Ugh.

I resist the urge to throw her off of me, instead gently trying to push her backward. I need to get this out. She shoves my hands away and grabs for my belt, a determined look in her tear-filled eyes. Alice isn’t usually this forward, and she’s never been into oral, but here we are.

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