Page 96 of Suddenly Entwined

“When you guys started…dating or whatever, it killed me. What does this twenty something know about loss? About being a parent? I thought so many nasty things.”

It’s uncomfortable to listen to her confession, but so much of her behaviour now makes sense.

“I thought a lot of mean things, too. I thought for sure you and Berg were involved the first time I saw you. For a long time, I doubted I had anything to offer a couple of kids either.”

“Oh, but you do. When I lost my husband, I threw myself into work. I’m a lawyer, and he was too, but I tried to work part time so I could care for Milly when she was little. Afterhe died, I went all in and made partner at the firm. Add that to my duties on the PAC? I’m in over my head…and my daughter is obviously suffering. This isn’t the first time I’ve been called in to talk about her behaviour. Yes, kids need material items to survive…but they don’t need all the stuff I was trying to provide if it comes at the expense of time and attention. This will be my last year on the PAC and I’m stepping out of such a senior role at work. Milly is going to have to get used to life without horseback riding lessons.”

Her honesty is so refreshing.

“I bought a goddamn cake for the auction.”

“Whaaat? You bought that?” I say, voice heavy with sarcasm.

“When they told me how much it cost when I picked it up, I almost dropped dead.”

“Oh no. We weren’t much better than the kids, were we?”

Tamara laughs, shaking her head.

“We just haven’t punched each other yet.”

“Believe me, I wanted to.”

The door pushes open and Louisa steps out, handing me her backpack and going to join Natalie where she’s picking daisies on the field.

Tamara holds her hand out to me.

“Truce?”

I take it in a firm grip.

“Truce.”

We walk towards our cars, the girls so much more silentthan normal.

“Hey, Caro?”

“Ya?”

“None of us actually know what we’re doing. We’re all faking this parenting thing. You might not actually be their mother, but you’re faking it really damn well.”

My eyes burn with tears. God, it was easier to hate this woman.

***

“Natalie?” I rap my knuckles on the bathroom door. “You okay?”

“I’m fine!”

“Okay…cause you don’t sound fine, honey.”

“Don’t call me that!”

Her tone of voice stings, but I swallow down my feelings about it.

“Alright. I’m sorry.”

“When is my dad coming home?”