Page 72 of Where the Stars Heal

Forcing myself to pull my hands away, I eye the folded piece of paper. That sinking feeling in my gut deepens, and I know that whatever it says will change everything. I can hear my heart pounding in my ears, the paper crackling as I unfold it, flattening it out over my knee.

Dear Halle,

I’m sorry for all of the pain I have caused you.

I told you the story of how Aiden died. I told you it was a deal gone wrong, but there were details I left out, and when you so bravely told me your story last night, everything clicked into place. Hunter and I knew there was a possibility that the towns we came from were the same. We knew, but we didn’t go in search of the answer. We wanted to leave our pasts where they belonged. But it seems mine has caught up to me.

Our stories are connected, sweetheart. Your mom bought those pills from Aiden and me.

I killed your mom, and I am so sorry.

The money we took from her wasn’t enough to cover what we owed. Aiden was shotto settle that debt, and two days later, your mom had chosen to overdose. I should have connected it sooner. You have her eyes. They’re the same blue, but where yours a sad and gray, hers were haunted and pale.

I live with so much guilt, Halle, and it’s going to tear me apart. It’ll tear you apart, and you have worked so hard to find your place here, to finally have the family you always deserved. I won’t take that away from you. I won’t take any more from you.

Please don’t come after me, sweetheart. Don’t wait for me.

Live your life, be happy, lean on Hunter, and chase your dreams.

I am so sorry,

Ash.

I can’t breathe. My lungs tighten as my eyes trace the uneven lines of his small handwriting. Wet dots appear, smudging the ink as they fall onto the torn paper. Drop after drop, blurring the lines together.

Please don’t come after me, sweetheart. Don’t wait for me.

He left. I can feel it, the ache in my chest as anotherhole opens, the edges pulsing, aching in ways I’ve never known. How could he leave? He didn’t kill Mom. He didn’t. She did. She chose to take the pills, chose to buy them. It was her decision to do what she did, not his.

“Oh god.”

The words spill out as a cry breaks free, and my hands fly to my mouth, too late to stop the sound. He ran, but he shouldn’t have. He should have stayed. We are stronger together.

My door swings open, slamming against the wall, and I flinch, the sudden bang ringing straight through my pounding head. Hunter stands there, his shoulder tense, a letter of his own hanging by his fingertips, his eyes full of hurt. We don’t move, the space between us feeling heavier by the second. His gaze flicks to the letter resting on my knee, and the muscle in his jaw ticks. There’s an unspoken question hanging between us:Why did he leave?

Hunter steps forward, but just as he reaches the edge of my bed, Madi barges through, her hair piled into a messy nest, sleep shorts twisted, and her shirt on backward. She doesn’t seem to care or even glance at Hunter. Without a word, she crawls up the bed, wrapping her arms around me in a hug that feels so familiar, so much like Mom’s, that something inside me cracks.

I let the emotions free, my head falls forward, burying into her shoulder, and as the tears come in uncontrollably, another set of arms wrap around me.

“We’ve got you, girl,” Tess murmurs in my ear.

Lifting my head slowly, my gaze finds Hunter through the blur of tears. Standing there, his eyes soften, and a sad smile tugs at his lips as he mouths the words carefully,I’ll be in the kitchen. There’s too much happening, too many emotions. The room is still spinning, and my head is stillthrobbing. But I know he needs me because his best friend just left him too. When I give a small nod, he turns silently and slips out of the room.

“So,” Connor finally breaks the silence, his voice cutting through the awkwardly quiet room, “how are we gonna get our boy back?”

We’ve been sitting around the kitchen for what feels like hours now. After I managed to shower and pull myself together, I found Hunter out here, hunched over the table, the letter still in his hands. He kept reading it, over and over. I didn’t ask what it said, and he didn’t ask about mine. We didn’t need to. We both knew they were similar, that they were goodbye letters. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him into a hug. It was a hug that saidI’m here for you too.

Not long after, the girls joined us, and then Connor and Jace walked in with trays of coffee and breakfast wraps in hand. The smell of fresh bacon and coffee turned the inside of my stomach with both hunger and nausea.

We ate in silence and drank our coffees, the sweet taste doing nothing to revive me. I waited until the trembling in my hands had eased and my leg had stopped tapping, until I was sure I could speak without breaking. And then I told them everything.

I spoke of the night I found Mom, my gaze never leaving Hunter. I needed him to understand what I had been through, and with every word, I watched a little more of him crumble, the pain in his eyes cutting into me. He stoodabruptly, his chair falling back, and he hugged me so fiercely I couldn’t breathe. When we finally pulled apart, I took a shaky breath and kept going.

I told them about Aiden and how our events were intertwined in ways none of us wanted to believe. I told them about Asher and how he had made mistakes, ones that he’s paid for greatly. I told them how I knew deep down that he wasn’t at fault, that what our mom chose to do was on her and her only.

“We are his family, and we don’t give up on family,” I said.

I looked around the room, my chest tight with worry, but when my eyes met Hunter’s, all I could see was pride. The girls were wiping their tears, and I sat back, sighing in relief.

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