Page 4 of Where the Stars Heal

Unscrewing the lid, I throw back two pills, washing them down with my water. I fall to the bed and breathe a heavy sigh. It’ll be okay, I tell myself. I’ll get through this. I’ll help Hunter out where I can to pay my way, but I’ll stay invisible to his friends and the people around town. It’s what I do best, stay invisible. I’m a waste of space anyway, and the sooner Hunter thinks I’m okay again and that we’ve rebuilt our lost relationship, he’ll be able to let me go and stop feeling guilty for leaving me all those years ago. Then I won’t feel like I’m imposing anymore.

My eyes start feeling heavy. This is my favorite part, where my awareness of everything starts fading away. The urge to sleep overpowers the negative thoughts that course through my head, and the calmness settles into my bones and mind.

I hear the bang of the door, the shuffling of feet next. I can’t quite tell how conscious I am, or how much is my mind playing tricks on me, but his deep raspy voice breaks through the fog.

“What, she couldn’t even come out and meet us? Introduce herself and say hi?”

He sounds angry. Why is he so angry?

“Dude, would you just leave it be? She’s gone through enough. I’m going to give her a second chance, okay? Help her get back on her feet. And mind your tone. She’s on the other side of that door and could hear you.” Hunter. That’s who says that.

I start to drift further before that angry voice comes back.

“Just be careful, man. You’ve also been through enough and don’t need to go back there. Help her but don’t let her walk all over you.”

Well, fuck you, Mr. Angry Voice, you don’t know shit about me. Before I can overthink those words, the last bit of my consciousness floats away and I drift back into my happy place. The void, where I can’t feel anything. Where the pain is numb and the darkness makes sense to me.

Tomorrow, I’ll make more of an effort… Tomorrow.

2

I’M THE NEW GIRL.

HALLE

I’m in Hunter’s kitchen looking for coffee, but, of course, I can’t find any. Shuffling around as quietly as I can, I have no idea what time he came home this morning or if anyone else came home with him. I at least had a solid sleep last night, but skipping food after a long drive probably wasn’t the brightest idea, and now I’m paying for it. Opening cupboards and peeking into the fridge, I come up with nothing. For a guy who has a lot of people around all the time, it’s pretty empty in here.

“If you’re looking for coffee, you won’t find any. Hunter is the worst at keeping his kitchen stocked.” I push the fridge door closed and turn around slowly, not recognizing the voice and preparing to feel judged.

My eyes go wide as I stare at her. She’s stunning. She looks older than me, maybe around thirty, like Hunter. She’s standing there, tying her long blonde hair up into a messy ponytail, looking at me with a thoughtful glint in her eyes. She has a pretty, round face and curves that fit those denim shorts and white tank top perfectly, curves that anyone would wish to have.

“But if you want, I’d happily take you to the local coffee shop to get one. I could go for one of their killer muffins, too.” She sounds so happy.

I stand there, frozen, not quite sure what to say. Time feels slow and the sun shines through the back windows. I hear a door down the hall open and close. I wait for her to ask why I’m snooping, or to even ask who I am. I realize as the seconds go by that she’s waiting for me to answer her.

“Ah, I don’t even know you.” If she picks up on my bitchy tone, she doesn’t pay any attention to it.

“Shit, I’m sorry. My name’s Madison, but everyone around here calls me Madi. Your brother, however, calls me Mads. Please don’t call me Mads, it drives me crazy.” She says this with a joking tone, but I think she’s being serious.

“You mean, it makes you mad, like, crazy mad?” I mock back.

She grabs my arm and starts pulling me toward the front door. “Oh god, not you too. Please don’t be like your brother. I need another girl around here to stand against all the boys.”

We’re halfway down the driveway when I realize I have no shoes on and no money with me, and I still don’t really know who she is or why she was in my brother’s house.

“Hey, ah, should I go back and get money and maybe some shoes,” I say hesitantly, not sure if she’ll be frustrated with me for screwing this up already.

Madison spins around, arms out wide. She pauses in front of me but starts walking backward. “Halle, girl, you’re in Sunlit Cove now. Shoes aren’t always needed, and it’s my treat. Call it a welcoming coffee.”

She turns back around and starts off down the street. I stare at her for a beat and wonder how in the span of ten minutes, I went from feeling so out of place and notknowing what to do, if I should hide in my room and wait for Hunter to wake up or go explore on my own, to smiling a little for the first time in over five years, feeling somewhat welcomed—all because of this sunshiny girl.

Twenty minutes later, I’m sitting outside at the one and only coffee shop here, Sunlit Espresso. Main Street is only a ten minute walk from Hunter’s place, which is very convenient.

Madison takes a bite of her blueberry muffin and holds up the plate in front of me. “Are you sure you don’t want any? They’re the best blueberry muffins you’ll ever eat.” She says this so enthusiastically, like they’re her life source. It’s kind of funny.

“I’m good, thanks though,” I say, taking another sip of my coffee, which by the way, I have to admit is one of the best coffees I’ve ever had. My mind takes me back to last night.

I don’t remember much after I got Hunter to finally leave me alone. I took those pills again, and that’s it. I hate taking them, but I can’t help it. When my anxiety peaks like that, when my breathing gets out of control and I start overthinking, I just need to shut it off. I need the loudness to go quiet again. It’s the only way I know how. But something is nagging at the back of my mind. Like something happened just as I was about to pass out.

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