Page 2 of Back In the Shadows

I understood what he was hinting at, although he attempted to keep me away from his extracurricular activities. As a result, I didn’t bother asking for any details.

“While you’re spending time with Alaric, I’ll clean up.” I pointed to the baby spit-up that covered my lilac T-shirt. Eventually, I might be able to wear something nice again, but with the twins, there was no use in trying until they were older.

I hurried up the staircase, my feet light on each step. I paused as I reached the babies’ room and gently pushed open the door. The soft sounds of Verity’s breathing filled the air as she lay nestled in her crib, her tiny lips making small sucking noises as she slept soundly. My heart swelled with love as I watched her for a moment before continuing to my bathroom.

Ten minutes later, I was freshened up and wearing a black sundress with a pretty pattern of bright-colored flowers. My teeth were brushed, and I’d removed the hair tie, allowing my long, dark locks to tumble over my shoulders. Feeling a little more human, I strode down the hall and stopped at the twin’s room again. Death carefully bent over Alaric’s crib and lowered his son to the mattress. He covered him in his blue summer blanket, then turned to Verity’s bed. He remained still, watching her sleep.

My heart lodged in my throat with an onslaught of emotions—love, pride, fear, and excitement. Being married to Sebastian had its complications, but moments like these made me forget all my concerns. I had everything I could ever hope for: Sebastian, Death, kids, my parents, and friends. I lived in a beautiful home in upstate New York in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by the beauty of hardwood trees at the edge of the forest. It was quiet and peaceful. We also traveled whenever we wanted to. Sebastian’s private plane allowed us to pack up the babies and fly anywhere we dreamed of. The kids would be well versed in travel and different cultures, which made me happy that we were able to offer them those experiences.

As I stood alone in the quiet of my thoughts, I couldn’t shake off the feeling that something was missing. It wasn’t anyoneelse’s fault … it was my inner darkness that I had tried so hard to suppress after I’d killed John, the man who had repeatedly molested me and other children. But I had to push the forbidden craving away when I found out I was pregnant. My babies were more important than fueling that side of me. Even though I’d left my job at the lawyer’s office, where the adrenaline rush of dealing with dangerous men had been a constant presence in my life, I was now married to someone even more powerful and potentially dangerous. So what was it? The loss of adrenaline? Or had Death awakened something vile inside me? Were Alaric and I connected on a dark and twisted level? Was he more like me and craved the darkness?Stop! You’re a mother. You can’t entertain those kinds of feelings and memories of what you did to John anymore.

The barely audible sound of Death’s footsteps approached. His stormy grey eyes held a fleeting moment of sadness before they settled on me. I reached out and placed my hand on his chest, feeling the softness of his silk shirt beneath my palm.

“They have grown so much already,” he said, looking back at the sleeping twins.

“Yes, they do that. Grow up quickly,” I replied, trying to ease the tension apparent in his shoulders.

“How long do they normally nap?” he asked, shifting his weight from one foot to another.

“Usually a few hours. Once Lulu picks them up, we’ll have some alone time.” I peered at him through my dark eyelashes, already imagining him inside of me.

He grabbed my chin, digging his fingers into my jaw as he ravaged my mouth with a desperate hunger. His lips crushed against mine with a ferocity that made my head spin and my breath catch in my throat. The bruising pressure only heightened the intensity of our kiss, but I didn’t care. All I wanted was for him to return to me and never let go.

I stoodat the edge of the porch and waved goodbye as Lulu drove away with the twins. When Sebastian had first mentioned a nanny, I’d objected. I wanted to raise our babies. As the months passed, we were so exhausted and couldn’t spend any time together, so I gave in. She only worked a limited number of hours and didn’t live with us, so it felt like a good decision. Plus, it helped when Death appeared.

I closed the front door and raced up the stairs, my pulse pounding so loudly I could barely hear my footsteps. Anticipation fueled me as I entered the bedroom, eager for Death’s return. But my enthusiasm died in my throat when I saw Death perched on the edge of the bed. He turned his hollow gaze toward me, the darkness in his eyes swallowing any trace of light in the room. I froze in place, the air thick with a chill that seeped into my bones.

My bedspread was littered with newspaper articles, the sight of each one halting the beat of my heart, and a sharp gasp escaped me.

“What are you doing?” My voice quivered with fear and astonishment. “How did you find that?” I pointed to the papers strewn across the mattress.

Fury rippled off him in waves as he swept away the contents, and I watched it all flutter to the floor as he stood to his full six-foot-two frame. His gaze narrowed as he shot off the bed and stormed closer before I could blink. Pushing me against the wall, Death wrapped his large hand around my wrist and dug his fingers into my skin.

Death’s lips brushed my ear, and then he dragged them down the side of my neck. “You know better, little lamb.” He fisted my hair and jerked my head back. “You thought you were keeping it a secret from me, didn’t you?”

My blood froze in my veins. “I don’t keep secrets from you.” The tremble in my voice betrayed me. How had he found the file? I’d taken painstaking measures to conceal any evidence from Sebastian and Death.

“The manila envelope hidden in the floor beneath the rug. The pictures, the articles, the news clippings,” he growled. “What part of no did you not understand when you asked if you could look into my past? Several years ago, when Kip and Dope wanted to dig into who killed my parents, I told them the same thing. It’s risky and could lead to me. If they get to me, they get to you, so what makes you think you can fucking go behind my back?”

My heart felt like it was being crushed under the weight of my fear and desire, each beat hammering against my chest. The air around us crackled with tension as Death spoke. The truth was, I couldn’t stop myself from digging. Death wasn’t just my lover or the father of my children. He was a force beyond human comprehension, and that terrified me as much as it fascinated me.

Every time he appeared and disappeared, every mysterious moment where his eyes held secrets, I felt a gnawing uncertainty. Who was he really? What darkness lived inside him that could so seamlessly transition between gentle father and ruthless killer?

My past working with dangerous men had taught me one crucial lesson: knowledge was survival. And survival meant understanding every potential threat, even if that threat slept beside me, held our children, and kissed me with a passion that could consume worlds.

But more than fear, there was something else. A strange mirroring I saw between myself and Death. We both carried darkness. We both understood violence not as a horror, but as a language. My killing of John wasn’t just self-defense. It was a calculated act of survival. And Death? He was survival personified.

I needed to know if either or both of our children would inherit this darkness. If they would understand this unspoken language of power and endurance that ran through our veins.

So I collected newspaper clippings. Old records. Whispers from shadows. Not to expose Death, but to understand him. To protect my family from whatever powerful force he truly represented. If I ever found his parents’ killer, there would also be a need for vengeance and answers.

“You betrayed me, Ella. And now you will face the consequences.”

Fear clawed at my insides as I realized the gravity of my reckless actions and the severity of his intentions.

2

DEATH

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