Page 19 of Building My Pack

Nest. A secret nest in the basement. There's no going back from the chaos Stephanie and George have caused at this point, so I might as well get used to calling it as it is.

Thus, that explains how I ended up, hours later, thinking about my next conversation with my doctor while waiting for Kit to show up. My life has been built brick by brick with one solid lie as the mortar holding them together. If it’s cracked and the bricks are falling off, what's the point in trying to keep up with the lie anymore? I want to ask them about coming off my suppressants, but the thought of it makes my stomach hurt. If I do that, it'll be as if everything I worked so hard for was for nothing.

I'm in the middle of putting on my mascara as the thoughts flit through my mind. I stop, staring at myself in the mirror. I'd put extra effort into the full curls of my red hair and a darker, smoky effect around my eyes, but all of that dims to nothing as I say out loud to myself, "All of itwasfor nothing. Your boyfriend left you because you weren't good enough. You got fired and lost everything you've worked your whole life for. All because of a lie."

The last bit comes out more of a whisper and I have to brace my hands on the sink and take deep breaths to keep from crying and ruining my makeup. If it's this bad pretending to be a beta, how bad could it be letting the lie go and accepting being an omega? My parents are likely to disown me, but that doesn't mean that I'll be alone. Thomas offered his support where and whenever I should need it, including Chloe and the rest of their pack, too. One of my bigger questions is how Santiago and Kennedy will feel about it. They've been courting a beta so far. If they're not looking to settle down with an omega in their pack, will they decide to skip right past crazy-town, here? I would understand if they did, but it still doesn't settle well in my stomach. I've never been more drawn to anyone in my life than I am to them. My nest still has their scent in it, but it's growing fainter by the day. Especially as I'm adding more new stuff. Every time I walk down there, one deep breath has my shoulders and nerves relaxing. I'd almost considered wearing Kennedy's jacket out tonight, but figured it'd be too weird of an explanation if Kit were to ask why it smelled like an alpha. Plus, I don't want it wearing off faster than it needs to, so it'll be staying in my nest while I'm out tonight.

Speaking of which, the doorbell ringing pulls me out of my morose thoughts, and I stand to straighten myself back out. Brushing my hands down the front of my high-rise dark jeans, I pull my shoulders back and relax, making my dark-coral-colored top sit like it's supposed to. It's got a ribbon-type bottom to it that stretches around my body only a few inches below my breasts, leaving an inch or two of skin exposed between it and my jeans depending on which way I move. From the shoulders, it covers my chest in a v, Greek-goddess-style cut and has a soft flow down to almost my elbows. I'd bought it during the George era and the first time I'd tried wearing it had been informed that it wasn'tflatteringto a woman my size. He better be glad he's not here to say that to me tonight or I might just tell him where he can shove thoseflatteringcompliments of his.

Kit doesn't ring again, which speaks the measure of his patience, considering I take longer than I should to make it down to him. When I do finally swing the door open, I'm greeted with a smile that quickly dips down in surprise as he takes in my outfit. For a small tick, my insecurity rides high as I think maybe George had been right after all. But it only lasts as long as it takes Kit's smile to flare back up.

He might even be blushing a bit, though, it's hard to tell with the sun glaring behind him. "You look fantastic," he says finally.

"Thanks," I reply, returning his smile. "I'm not overdressed or anything, am I?"

He laughs, "Not at all. Even if you were, I wouldn't tell you."

Containing the crazy that wants to break free in the form of tears at the difference between this and the last time I tried wearing this top, I press my lips together and turn around to lock the door before following him out to his old, white pickup truck.

I can't help asking, "This is what you've been driving all over? Not that it's not nice, it's just kind of small."

He shrugs and pats it lovingly, "One and the same. We've had some wild adventures for sure. Have you ever laid in a truck bed underneath a sky full of stars and fell asleep trying to count them?"

"I can't say that I have," I tell him honestly before we're both hopping in the cab.

Cranking it and glancing my way, he supplies, "Maybe you should add that to your list. I'll even volunteer my truck's services."

Oh, Kit. What a dangerous man you are.I can't help thinking. It would be easy to fall for him as I'm sure many women have. The whole ride has me wondering yet again what the right choice is. It'd be effortless to stay on my suppressants and love another beta again. My only drawback to that is that I'll have to let Santiago and Kennedy off the hook. As though their ears were burning with knowledge that I'm thinking about them, my phone rings in my pocket. When I dig it out, it's to see Santiago's name splashed across the screen. I silence it, but don't send him to voicemail. Something I didn't consider until I saw his name was that I may not be given a choice either way. Two highly successful alphas may not want to have ties to an omega who has just had an entire upset in her career and may never work in the industry again. I'm not exactly hoping for it, but it would be easier having the decision made for me.

"If you need to speak privately, we're almost there," Kit mentions beside me.

I turn to him and my lips part, but nothing seems to want to come out. Taking a look at what has to be a gaping fish expression on my face, he adds, "Or, you could always enjoy yourself tonight and make that call tomorrow."

Releasing a breath I didn't even realize I'd been holding, my stomach unclenches. Just for tonight I want someone else to take the reins of my life and make a decision or two for me, which didn't become obvious until Kit's suggestion.

"Thank you," I tell him quietly.

Without asking for an explanation, he nods slightly then says, "We're here."

Hereturns out to be a bar on the outskirts of town. I'd passed by this place a million times before traveling for clients. Never once have I considered stopping, and for a second I have to wonder if Kit is joking. Not like it's the worst establishment around, but it is a little worn down and the front sign hangs crooked.

"Don't let appearances deceive you," he says, pulling around toward the back and parking. "This place has apparently been around for quite some time, and the outside needs a little work. Inside will surprise you."

"Do you come here a lot?" I ask, hearing him speak like he's super familiar with it even though he doesn't live in one place for too long.

He shuts his door and turns to look at me. "I can't give away too many answers. Who is a person without a hint of mystery, eh?"

The laugh spills out of me just as he'd planned. He chuckles, meeting me at the back of the truck to lead us inside. Not for the first time today, Kit is right. From all appearances outside, I'd have said the interior would've been just as run down, but it's not. The table and chairs that are spaced around the room all shine like they're brand new. The walls are covered in every memorabilia imaginable from paintings, to signed pictures of musicians, and even street signs.

I try to take it all in as Kit grabs my hand and leads us over to the bar. A woman with brunette hair with purple splashed throughout is helping another customer then turns her attention to us. "Kit, my love, about time you showed up. Your boys are backstage waiting on you already. Who's the beauty?"

My face flames as her gaze drops to me and she shoots me a wink. Even across the bar I get a whiff of the smell of maple alpha rolling off her in waves. It's not unpleasant, but I much prefer Kit's clean ocean breeze.

Kit chuckles again as he catches sight of my cheeks and tells her, "This is Bryce. She's my guest tonight. Whatever she wants to order, just put it on my tab."

"Or I can put it on mine," she offers with another wink.

He tucks me closer to his body, and I wrap an arm around his waist. "She's already spoken for, Violette."

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