Page 26 of Refusing Kendall

A wry smile flits across those sexy lips, “You’ll laugh if I tell you.”

“Cross my heart I won’t,” I say, making the motion with my hand.

He rolls his eyes before letting them drift back down to me, “I don’t like enclosed, dark spaces.”

“Why would I laugh at that?” I ask. “It’s a legit fear called claustrophobia.”

“Yeah, well, I think it’s more the dark than the tight spaces,” he admits.

“Even still,” I tell him wrapping my arms around his waist, “I would never laugh at you for being honest with me about something. I’ve been kind of scared of the dark since Goose and I were attacked, so I can see why it would bother you.”

Pulling back far enough to glare down at me, he looks angry, “Have you told anyone about that?”

“About what? What happened, or being scared of the dark ever since?” I answer. When he nods at the last, I shrug, “It’s stupid, truthfully. I don’t know why it’s still happening. It’s not really bad or anything. Just enough to make me take a step back before walking down a dark hallway.”

He tucks me back underneath his chin, “Next time, don’t wait to tell us.”

I nod and even though he can’t see it, I know that he can feel it. Changing the subject back to him, I ask, “What about your family? I’ve never met any of them, and you never talk about them.”

Mav takes a deep breath before he answers, “There’s not much to tell really. My grandparents were rich. Some of that old money. When they passed away, Mom got filthy rich, and I got a trust fund. I would trade it to have them back in a heartbeat. My mom is a different story, though. She saw it as a way out of marriage to my father. I got dragged along behind her as she hopped from man to man, each one worse than the last. Instead of fighting for her, my dad decided to take up drinking. He lives out on the west coast somewhere. Last I heard, he was in some biker gang out there.”

“And your mom?” I ask quietly.

He looks out over the water above my head, “She’s better now. I think it has a lot to do with my stepdad threatening to leave. It’s been ten years now, and she’s been not only clean, but faithful to him too.”

“Is that why you hated me so much when you first met me?” I ask, looking up to his face so I can see his expression.

Glancing down, he locks eyes with me, “I didn’t hate you, but that may have been part of it. I saw all the destruction she left in her wake, and I swore to myself I would never be on the receiving end of that. From the moment you told Teagan off in that restaurant and threw his money back in his face, I felt like I had to know you. Then, when I saw that the others were getting involved too, my mom and her bullshit flashed in front of my eyes. They might as well be my brothers, and all I could see was you hurting them. That’s why I lashed out at you at the cabin. I know you let me off easy for that. I didn’t deserve for you to let me back into your life after how cruel I was.”

I shake my head, “You guys came back for me. I was so fucked in the head. Even with my promise to Gramps at the hospital, I couldn’t pull myself out of it. Plus, you did apologize, you know. Words can be empty sometimes. Actions speak louder than words, and you came back for me.”

A smile passes over his face, and he leans down to press his lips against mine.

The horn of the ship announces our arrival back at the dock. It makes me sad in a way, because who knows when I’ll get the chance to have Mav willing to be an open book in front of me again.

My facial expressions must give me away, because he lifts my chin until I meet his eyes, “I am yours, Kendall. Anytime you want to ask me anything, or want me to yourself, I’ll be here.”

“I’d like more time like this,” I admit. “I love having all of us together, but it can be overwhelming sometimes. Only because I feel like I don’t space my time out evenly with everyone.”

“Do you regret making the decision to love us all?” he asks softly.

I do the best Mav impression that I can when I lift my eyebrow at him, “It was never a decision. It just happened, and I’m glad that it did.”

There isn’t much time for chatting after that. The boat docks, and we unload. Riding home in the Rover is even more quiet than it was this morning. I think we’re both lost in our own heads. As we get back to the house and step back inside, the first thing I notice is the smell. Someone actually cooked and didn’t burn the house down. I’m surprised when the kitchen comes into view, and Goose stands over the stove with an apron tied around his waist.

He must not have heard us come in as I’m able to sneak up behind him and circle my arms around his waist into a hug, “Something smells good.”

I feel the vibration of his chuckle through his back, “Lucas is slowly but surely rubbing off on me. Can’t say the same for T, but my stuff should be edible tonight.”

“Hey,” Teagan objects, coming around the corner from upstairs and catching the end of what Goose says, “I may not be able to cook anything other than boxed pizza, but I do a damned good job of it.”

I bury my face into Goose’s back as we laugh. Teagan tugs me to him, taking one hand to spin me around before bringing us chest to chest, “Admit it, sweets,” he smiles down at me, “I can make some hella good pizza.”

Grinning up at him, I acknowledge his skills, “That’s right, pumpkin. Pizza is your forte. Oh, and ice cream. You make the best bowl of ice cream on this side of this Mississippi.”

It’s dead silent in the kitchen for a good twenty seconds before Goose loses it and goes into a laughing fit. Even Mav, who is leaning against the counter doesn’t hold back. Indignation shows on T’s face before he glances down at mine and then lets out a bark of a laugh himself.

“Ok, what did I miss?” Lucas asks, strolling in with a platter of steaks in his hand. He must have been outside at the grill, if the slight pink tinge to his cheeks says anything.

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