Page 20 of My Heart To Heal

I’m on my way to the bathroom when there’s a knock at the door, so I turn back and open it to be faced with Missy staring at me wide-eyed, her attention fixed on my bare torso.

I clear my throat, and she blinks herself back from wherever she just was.

‘Um, hey,’

‘Hi.’ I would never usually answer the door shirtless, but my attention is just elsewhere today, and I wasn’t thinking, but I do like the way she’s looking at me.

‘Uh, this was in one of my bags. It must have dropped in there somehow.’ She holds out my cell phone, and I take it, curious as to how that could have happened.

‘Doesn’t seem likely.’

Fuck, Nick,why?

‘Sorry?’

‘Well, my cell was in my pocket, so I don’t know how it would have fallen into one of your bags.’

What is wrong with me? Shut the fuck up, Nick.

‘Yeah, me either, but it was in there, so I guess it did.’ She arches an eyebrow at me and crosses her arms across her chest. ‘Unless you’re accusing me of something?’

‘It’s just a little weird.’

‘Yes, it is.’ We hold each other’s gaze for a moment before she turns away and then turns back. ‘Why do you keep doing this? I try to be nice to you, then you act like a total dick all over again.’

I feel my brows lower. I wish I knew the answer.

‘Thank you for bringing my phone back.’

She turns, releasing a frustrated huff, and stomps into her apartment, slamming the door, and I stand still for a moment, staring in the direction of her departure, before I realize, Doug might have been right. Ilikefighting with her. I have been numb for so long and sparring with Missy makes me feel something.

I close my door and head for the bathroom as I process the new realization. Maybe, for me at least, our frustration with each otherisforeplay.

‘Morning.’

I did not need to see her rightnow. I’m in a bad fucking mood this morning. I caught myself with my dick in my hand and her on my mindagain,and I feel like a jackass for allowing myself to think about her that way. I just can’t seem to stop.

‘Missy,’ I grunt as I lock my apartment door and head toward the stairwell. Jonah isn’t with her, I notice, so she must have just taken him to school.

‘Well, at least you’re consistent.’

‘Excuse me?’ I come to a stop, and she turns to look at me.

‘Your pissy mood. I’m glad it seems to be your default setting — at least I know where we’re at.’

‘My default setting? Are you serious right now?’ I grin, but I’m not amused. ‘Mypissymood comes from the dust all overmyapartment from work happening inyours. Mypissymood comes from not being able to park my damn car outsidemyhome because of the trucks of the people working onyoursalon. Mypissygoddam mood comes from being woken up on my fucking day off by banging and scraping and Mariah fucking Carey.Youare the reason for my pissy mood, Missy.’

Her lips part, and I notice the bob of her throat as she swallows.

‘I’m sorry. I didn’tmean to...’ her voice is small, and I feel guilty, but instead of apologizing for snapping, I do the most Nickish thing I can and dig in.

‘I don’t give a damn what you mean or don’t mean, but don’t give me attitude on my own damn doorstep.’

‘I said I’m sorry.’

‘Don’t need your apology, need you to keep the fucking noise down.’

Stepping past her, I make my way down the stairs and out onto the street. I’m an asshole, and she’s never going to let me in.

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