Page 97 of Legal

“Oh… okay then.”

“Are you ill? Do you need to sit down?” The woman was peering at me with a concerned expression, making me wonder how I must look to her.

“No, I’m fine. Thank you for your time.”

I wandered back to my car and got inside. What just happened here? I drove like a lunatic on heavily trafficked roads for what… a used board game? I didn’t understand my impulsive reaction. Yes, Chase and I had played that game, but we did lots of things together. Should I have been saving all our used condoms too?

I started the drive back home. It’s a fucking game, I reminded myself. I could go buy a brand spanking new one right now. One that didn’t have a beer stain on one of the cards or have his fingerprints all over the damned timer.

Only a game, Jillian.

Plop.

A fucking game.

Plop plop.

It means nothing.

Plop plop plop.

I was underwater by the time I made it home. A drowned mess. Hair sticking to my face, snot running down my lips. I didn’t even know how I did it. My eyes felt like someone had poured acid into them.

I went inside and straight to my room, having no recollection if I’d seen or talked to Mike. I shut my door and crawled into bed, the tears never once taking a break, the sobs never once quieting from my mouth.

At one point in the night, I glanced over and saw Perry sitting there. “How…?” I had to be dreaming.

“Shhh…” She came over and rocked me like a child. “Don’t talk, just cry. You need this, Jills. I’m here for you.”

I stayed in that room for three days. I started to believe I was sick for as much as I slept. When I was awake, Perry was either forcing me to eat tasteless soup, or I was crying, sometimes both. My eyes had become swollen slits.

By the time my jag had finally come to an end, I was tapped dry. Wiped out as if I’d been through a seventy-two-hour labor, not lounging around in bed. But it all had worth, because once the gunk cleared away, I was left with a clear mind.

“I love him, Perry.”

“I know you do.”

“Do you think I’m too late?”

“I don’t know. I’d like to think not.”

I sat up in bed and guzzled from my water bottle. My mouth tasted like I’d barely survived a bout of the stomach flu. “I need to brush my teeth.”

“Yes, you do.”

“And take a shower.”

“Yes, you definitely do.” She smiled. “Good thing you have a working air conditioner, or things could have gotten a whole lot funkier in here.”

“Still hot out?” I asked. It was a strange feeling to have days of your life disappear.

“Yep.” We were in the middle of an Indian summer and temps were hovering in the high eighties. “But I did open the windows at night to get in some fresh air.”

I didn’t know how she managed to stay with me so long. “I hope I didn’t get you in trouble with your job.” I quickly scanned through my schedule, praying I hadn’t bailed on any appointments. Whew… I lucked out.

She waved her hand. “I took vacation days. I had extra anyway.”

“Thank you, Perry.” Who else could have taken care of me like that? My money wouldn’t have gone on my ex, especially because my breakdown was due to reasons he’d never understand. “What made you come here in the first place?”