Page 126 of Lyrical

She flipped me off, then blew me a kiss before skipping into the kitchen. I put my hands over my own rounded belly. I was only a couple weeks ahead of her, but I might as well have been overdue. Ugh.

When she returned, she was carrying a huge assortment of candy, the purple stone in her ring clashing with the orange bowl. She gave away the large bars and king-sized packages every year, wouldn’t dream of gypping the kids with a measly fun-size.

I groaned when she set the bowl within my reach. “Shouldn’t you be giving away apples or toothbrushes or something?” Figured I couldn’t eat the shit anymore. Someone out there was having a huge laugh at my expense. Anything too sugary no longer agreed with me, made me sick as a dog. Once I’d discovered that I’d felt much better, but what the fuck?

“Oh stop complaining,” she said. “You’re not the only one suffering here. You know I can’t eat super spicy food without it bothering me. I’m dying for a triple order of fajitas.”

I rolled my eyes. “That’s all you’ve got? Please, Jills. I’ll see your food intolerance and raise you a two-ton Tessie who can barely roll herself out of bed in the morning.”

She put her hands on her hips. Too. Fucking. Adorable. “You would’ve been less cranky if you just would’ve gotten into the spirit and dressed up a little.”

“I am dressed up. I’m a heffalump.”

Jills shook her head and peeked out the blinds, too damn eager for the trick-or-treaters to start arriving. “I even offered to paint your belly as a jack-o’-lantern.”

“And you know how well that went over.”

Yeah, I was cranky, but I’d been living with Mrs. Pregnant America for the past week. That could beat an egomaniac into submission.

“What were you thinking saying it’d be an awesome idea to get knocked up together?”

“That was your idea, Perry.”

“Same thing.”

“No, it’s not.”

Geez, one of these days she’d learn. I shifted my ass over so it wouldn’t make permanent indents on her couch. I was jonesing for the entire contents of that bowl in front of me. I was irritable as fuck is what I was.

“If it’ll make you feel better,” she said, “you should see Candace. Her belly finally matches her lips. She looks like a two-story house.”

“When is she due?”

“Two days ago. Mike’s a wreck.”

“Damn doctors. What does he know? She’s probably still a week early.”

“Shoulder surgeon, remember? Not an obstetrician.”

“He should still know better.” But at least the asshat finally stepped up to the plate and became a man. He’d married Candace and appeared ready to have another son. Took him long enough.

“Oooh, I see the first group coming down the street.” She bounced up and down as she watched through the window, then snatched the bowl of candy and waited by the door.

“You’re supposed to make them work for it, Jills. Not hand deliver it on a gold-plated pillow.”

She waved me over. “You gotta see, Perry. It’s the whole cast fromWizard of Oz. So cute. Hurry up.”

“All right,” I mumbled. I could easily watch from the couch, but she’d be too disappointed if I didn’t at least get up for the initial batch of kids.

I stood with her at the door as they bounded up the front steps. “I make a better Dorothy,” I said and she elbowed me.

What?It was true. One year I dressed up as her and Stephen was the lion. We both looked sexy as fuck. I sighed. That seemed like a lifetime ago.

She swung open the glass door with a cheek-splitting smile. Didn’t even make them ring the bell.

“Trick-or-treat,” they all said in unison. Yeah, they were pretty damn cute. Most of them.

“Just look at you all. How wonderful.” Jills held out the bowl. “Pick anything you’d like.”

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