Page 12 of Lyrical

“Grandpa Frank is cooking, like usual. Although the last thing you probably want to eat is more Italian food….”

He laughed. “Mom, it’s fine.”

Good thing I snagged a close spot since he wasn’t dressed for a Wisconsin winter night. I popped the trunk, and he lifted his bag in. I was standing there shivering in my fur boots, jeans, and pythonneck sweater, and I had a decent coat to cover it all. But Daniel was barely twitching. Men.

Oh, right. Men.

We got inside, and I started the car. “The man I’ve been seeing, Chase. He’ll be there tonight. I want you to meet him. Is that okay? I mean, already?”

He laid his head back on the seat and yawned. “No problem.”

I thrummed my fingers on the steering wheel. Was it really no problem, or was he just too tired to think straight?

I pulled out and made the quick jaunt over to the interstate. It took about thirty minutes to get to Mom’s from there. I glanced over; his eyes were closed. What was I thinking scheduling something his first day back? It was 1:00 a.m. in Milan; he should’ve been sleeping, especially if he didn’t sleep the night before. No, maybe this was better. He had to adjust to the new time zone quickly if he was already starting interviews on Tuesday.

Hmm.

“Daniel?” I whispered.

No answer. It’d be good for him to get some rest. A little nap wouldn’t mess with his jet lag too badly. He’d still sleep later.

I inhaled as slowly as I could, exhaled the same, making a game of it. I didn’t want to turn on the radio, and I was going out of my freaking mind. I did not want to be alone with my thoughts right then.

I’d planned to use this drive to get completely up-to-date on my son’s life. Sure, we talked on the phone once in a while, but usually it was e-mails and texts. I knew about all the courses he took at the university, what his residence hall looked like, the friends and classmates he’d hung out with. He always sent pictures of the places he’d frequented or the weekend trips he took when he wasn’t studying his ass off. The street vendor who made his favorite frittinis. I knew plenty of things, but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t the same as hearing it all from his mouth.

I wish I could’ve visited, but it had never worked out. He’d transferred from UWM into the international program around the time Mike and I were finalizing our divorce, and then I threw myself back into my recruiting business. Later when Daniel and I tried syncing our schedules, they’d never lined up, unfortunately.

Tiny flakes began to hit the windshield, and I turned on my wipers. It’d give me something to concentrate on for the rest of the drive. I wondered what Chase was doing at that moment, if my mom was fawning all over him like she tended to do. God, was he as nervous as me? This was a big deal. A. Big. Fucking. Deal.

My teeth chattered. I was colder than usual lately. Why was it even snowing? It should’ve been too cold to snow. The weather was acting wonky, or maybe that was me. The heat was blasting on my face, dethawing me but giving me a headache. I couldn’t wait to get out of the car.

Check that: I was scared to get out of the car.

I glanced over at Daniel—still crashed out hard. I moved the vent down so it was blowing on my legs, making my cheeks instantly freeze, my nose probably resembling a cherry Ring Pop. I watched as the flakes grew bigger. I needed to focus. I needed to stop shivering; I had to be steadier at the wheel.

If Chase were here, he’d heat me up. He’d cover me with his body and make me so hot I’d—Do not get fucking turned on in this car with your adult son sleeping in the passenger seat. What the fuck is wrong with you, Jillian?

Argh.

The rest of the drive was uneventful. I somehow kept it together long enough to get us there safely. But when my tires crunched over their driveway, I felt so wound up I was considering jumping out and shoveling right then just to release some energy.

I turned off the car and sat for a second, even though my muscles were screaming at me to unwind them. I let my shoulders drop, hoping the rest of me would follow suit. I needed to relax.Calm and steady wins the race.Channel your inner turtle, Jillian.

“Daniel.” I rubbed his arm. “Daniel,” I said a bit louder. “We’re here.”

His lids peeked open and he yawned again, scrubbing his hands up his face and through his hair.

“Okay.” He stretched out his arms in front of him. “Wow, I was out cold, wasn’t I?”

“Yes, you were. I guess you needed it. Ready?”

“Yeah. I just need to grab something out of the trunk.”

I popped it open and grabbed my purse, slinging it over my shoulder. Then I opened the door to a face full of wet. I glanced at the front door, wondering if they were watching us. They would have heard us drive up, would have noticed the headlights as they sliced through the house.

Daniel pulled a smaller bag out of his suitcase, then slammed the trunk closed.

“What’s that?”

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