Page 56 of Volatile

“So. There was this guy who used to come in pretty regularly. It was obvious he had a thing for Pamela, and she was a little giddy over it. He was attractive, and based on his clothes and the tips he threw around, he was wealthy as well. But I didn’t trust him. Something in his eyes gave me cause for concern. I tried warning Pamela, but she thought I was being silly.”

Ivy hesitated, her mind flashing with images of the way Sam had looked at Pamela. Not how a man usually looks at a woman he’s sexually attracted to, but with a disturbing desire that gave her icy chills. It was the eyes. Something was not good behind them.

“She started seeing him after work, and more often than not, she’d go back to his place. She told me he liked things on the kinky side. Bondage. Spanking. Role-playing. Stuff like that. He called himself a Dominant. It was nothing that fazed her at first because she was really into this guy, and she said the sex was seriously hot. Exciting and different. The more she saw him, the more she pulled away from everyone. Her bubbly personality became nonexistent. And then one day she showed up with all these weird cuts and bruises. She’d tried to cover them with makeup, but it didn’t do shit. I freaked out and threatened to call the cops, but she told me not to worry about it. He was into BDSM, she’d said, and it was no big deal. But it was a big deal because she wasn’t the same person anymore. She’d become paranoid like she was afraid to say or do the wrong thing. He no longer came into the restaurant, but he’d always wait for her in the parking lot. One night I walked out with her and watched her get into his car. His eyes were so cruel. He called her a worthless whore, then slapped her face. Before I could do anything, he drove off and....”

“Ivy, I’m so sorry, but that’s not—”

“Please. I’m almost finished.”

She felt his soft lips on her closed lids, then on her mouth. When he shifted away, she continued. “Pamela didn’t come into work the next day, and she didn’t answer her calls. I was frantic. I didn’t know what was wrong with me; I should’ve at least known where he lived. I should’ve tried following them. I should’ve reported him when I had the chance. What kind of friend was I? But it turned out that she was at home, curled up in a fetal position, raped and badly beaten. I begged her to press charges, but she refused to pursue it. She finally admitted she was too scared at the end to tell him no to anything he wanted, so she considered herself just as much at fault. He loved to see her degraded and in pain, and she did nothing to stop it.”

“What happened to her?” he asked quietly.

“I’d like to pretend she had a happy ending because she moved back home to Michigan and started over, but in reality, she was never the same again. How could you be when someone you trust destroys you? She broke off all contact with me and everyone else from her old life, but I did speak with her parents. They said she was on suicide watch after suffering from severe recurrent depression.”

Her heart shattered just thinking about Lily in a similar situation. She could only pray that she was over her little experimental phase and that Jonathan was helping her, even if he had to keep an open mind for the sake of being impartial.

“Again Ivy, I’m so very sorry for what happened to your friend. No one should ever have to go through that. And I do understand better why you’ve taken this hard stance with Lily, but please know that what Pamela experienced is not typical in BDSM communities.”

Her eyes snapped open. “Are you defending him?”

“Hell, no. If he were here, I’d kick the ever-living shit out of him and enjoy every second of it. What he did was reprehensible, not to mention illegal and immoral, but it was also not representative of a true Dominant.”

“Oh, so now you’re going to tell me that pain and humiliation have absolutely nothing to do with BDSM?”

If only she knew where to find that worthless piece of filth masquerading as a human being. She’d give almost anything to see him ooze back into Rig’s. Then he’d know the real meaning of pain and humiliation when his mouth was sutured shut with his sawed-off balls crammed inside.

Jonathan leaned over and touched her face, letting out a long breath. “I’m not going to lie, Ivy. These things may play a part for some in this lifestyle, but only if it’s agreed upon first. What your friend got sucked up in is cold, calculated abuse, and that’s not what Lily is involved in. She does not have a relationship fueled by fear. I want to do whatever I can to ease your mind about your sister.”

“My mind will be eased as long as she stays far away from anyone who wants to hurt her.”

“Just curious—have you actually done any research on these types of lifestyles on your own?”

“Don’t need to. Fuck research. I already got a crash course from Pamela. The too long, didn’t read? Dominant and submissive are just fancy words for sadistic abusers and brainwashed victims.”

“That’s a harsh generalization, don’t you think?”

“No.”

“Please come closer. I want to hold you.” She inched over, wanting that too. Besides, talking about all this had made her feel way too repulsed to get turned on. “Thank you for sharing with me, Ivy. You’ve filled in a lot of gaps. And not just with Lily.”

“How do you mean?”

“For one, the need to hide from me. Not wanting me to see inside you. It must be painful for you to be stuck in a battle between your desires and your beliefs.”

God, did she want to discuss this? It wasn’t like he already didn’t know. Jonathan hadn’t hurt her; he’d made her feel insanely good. It was a lot to get her head around.

“It wasn’t normal for me to get turned on from so much... intensity. It goes against what I feel is right. These are all firsts for me.”

“What about all that wild passion you and Wes shared?”

She smacked his chest, making him chuckle. He was teasing her, calling her out again. As if she’d ever fooled him to begin with. But she was happy he’d lifted the mood a bit. She was drained and didn’t want to talk anymore. There’d be plenty of time for that later. Right now she just wanted to be cocooned by the man beside her.

As if sensing what she needed, he didn’t further the conversation. Instead, they lay blissfully silent until her lids fluttered closed.

She peeked through her eyes to see him staring at her. The sun was making an appearance, and the last she’d remembered it’d been dark.

“Morning, beautiful.”

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