Page 8 of If Everything Was Easy

“Why are you mad at me? I’m the one who got hurt. I’m the one stuck in a wheelchair. I’m the one who can’t play the rest of the season. How did any of this hurt you?” I was screaming at this point, tears streaming down my face.

“Ava… do you hear this? All we do is fight. Why are you trying so hard to fix this? We aren’t good together.” There was no emotion in his voice. It was as if I never mattered to him, we never meant anything. I was a toy, and he was done playing with me. “I have to go. Good luck with all of that.” The line went dead.

It took a minute for it all to sink in, but when it did, I exploded. Anything I could reach, I swung my fist at. Madi came rushing out at one point, but just stayed out of the way until I calmed down.

“I hate him,” I seethed as I crossed my arms over my chest. “I have to work. I don’t have time for this,” I mocked him as Iglared out at the front yard. “Why are guys so dumb?” I glanced over at Madi. I wasn’t sure if I wanted her to answer me or not.

“When you find out, let me know.” She laughed lightly as she held her hands in front of herself. “You’ll find someone who loves you and respects you. Sometimes it just takes a while.” She moved closer and slowly sat down in the chair beside me. “It feels like a lifetime ago when your mom and I sat and talked about boys. I remember how hard your dad worked to get a date with her.” She laughed lightly and then sighed as if remembering was both hard and wonderful at the same time.

“But Mom fell in love.” I blinked tears away. Sadness was slowly replacing the anger as my heart felt the loss.

“She did, but it wasn’t for a long time. Your dad just didn’t give up. He knew she was the one, and he wasn’t going to go away without a fight.”

“I want someone to fight for me,” I mused.

“They will.” Madi patted my good leg. “How about we try to bake some cookies?” She grinned at me. This was her answer to everything when I was little. Any time I had a bad day, we’d bake. The year I got my period I think we baked every month until I accepted that it was something that wasn’t going away any time soon.

“Sure. Can we make chocolate chip?” The sadness started to subside as childhood memories flooded me.

“Yep, and maybe we’ll even bake a few.” She laughed as she stood and moved to push me back inside. The last few times cookies were whipped up, we ate so much dough that there wasn’t much to bake.

“This was a good idea,” I mumbled as I licked a dollop of dough off the spoon. “A very good idea.”

“Cookies are always a good idea.” Madi smiled as she pulled a tray from the oven.

“Maybe I could open a cookie shop if the whole soccer thing doesn’t work out,” I lamented as I stared at the cast on my leg.

“It’s only been two weeks.” Madi leaned against the counter and gave me the look that she’d perfected when she was my coach. “You have to give yourself a chance. Lots of athletes come back from injuries. I mean, your mom was so sick she couldn’t do much of anything when she was young, and look at the records she set in college.”

“I just feel like this happened at the worst possible time it could,” I growled. I was still angry over the whole situation.

“I know, but concentrate on the road back to success, not success ending.” Madi smiled as she moved behind me to push me into the living room. “We go back in a few weeks to get the pins out, then you can get out of this chair.” She plopped down on the couch beside me.

“I am looking forward to going back to class.” I nodded as I pictured being able to move back into my apartment. As much as I appreciated the help with everything, there were days I felt like I was being smothered.

Most of the afternoon was spent watching TV and talking about how dumb some of these reality stars were. I almost forgot I was hurt until Madi had to help me go to the bathroom. Dad camehome late, and after a short chat about his day, he helped me to bed.

I lay there, staring at the ceiling for who knows how long. Just thinking, and wondering what my mom thought about all of this. I didn’t have a letter for this big moment, the moment I had a major injury. I wondered if she ever thought I’d be chasing her records, or if she thought I’d want to play at all? Did she want me to be a soccer star? I honestly didn’t know what I’d do if I didn’t play. It was all I’d done since I could walk. So much of my childhood revolved around tournaments and camps.

This recovery time made me feel lost. Without soccer, I realized how much other stuff I didn’t have. Besides Danny, I never really dated. He worked because he played at the rec center too. I didn’t do the normal stuff kids did. I played, I practiced, and I got better. I’d often wondered what my life would have been like without it, and now I was getting a firsthand look. My life was boring, I just never knew it.

As the minutes passed by, my mind spiraled deeper and deeper into the what ifs. I finally fell asleep during the twilight hours after I promised myself I’d be better about doing the things I wanted to that didn’t involve the game. I needed a plan for after, and after might come sooner than I was hoping for.

Chapter 6

6 weeks later…

Ava

“Door!” I called from the hallway of our apartment.

“Coming.” Ashley came rushing towards me. I’d moved back in last week, and had been practicing navigating around on crutches since. It was easier to move around, but required more help, if you could believe it.

Ashley pushed the door to the bathroom open, and I hobbled over to the sink. “Thanks.” I leaned against the counter and went to work brushing my hair. The one thing people didn’t think about was… crutches helped you get somewhere, but once you got there, you couldn’t do anything because your hands were full.

“I’ll be in the kitchen making coffee. Call me when you need help.” She smiled and walked away.

Ashley’d been a great help since Id’ come back. I was sure I was driving her crazy, but there was a lot I still couldn’t do on my own. I was teasing when I first came back and told her I was going to call her backpack because she carried everything for me. This started a laughfest that we couldn’t seem to end. By the end of the night, she was calling me Dora.

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