Page 48 of Trusting You

“You’re not my mother,” my voice was monotone as I shook my head at her. “She is,” I pointed at Avery.

“I’m your mother!” she pointed at her chest. “I gave birth to you. I did. Not her!” she moved closer, causing me to step back.

“You were supposed to love me!” I bellowed. The anger I’d tamped down for years was rising faster than I could control. “You were supposed to protect me! To want me! DNA doesn’t make a mother!” I pushed through the people standing around me until I was right in front of her. “All I was was a person to get your beers for you, someone for Doug to hit. I never want to see you again,” I stepped around her and rushed down the steps as I raced to my parents’ house. I needed to get away from it all, and there was only one way I knew how to clear my head.

Melinda

I stood there and watched in horror as one of the best days in Aaron’s life turned into a nightmare. I didn’t know the history between his mom and the rest of the family, but I could tell by their reactions and what he’d told me in the past, that it was not a happy one. The strong confident man that I’d spent the last two years getting to know was reduced to a scared little boy with just a few words. His mother, Sara, threw a few well-placed barbs and pointed comments his way, and Aaron went running. I couldn’t blame him, but watching him shut down was painful.

“You ok?” Emma sat down beside me.

“I don’t know. I feel like I should do something, but I don’t know what,” I glanced around and saw Cam and Nick escorting Sara away by force.

“She’s been crazy since they met her,” Em pointed at Sara. “I don’t remember much, but I’ve heard Mom talk about her,” she shrugged. “I’ll look out for Brooklyn if you wanna go after Aaron.”

“I don’t even know where to start,” I looked around helplessly.

“Good thing you’re my best friend. I’d start with the beach,” she smiled as she stood up. “It’s about time a woman other than my aunt chased after him.”

When I got over the dunes, I searched for him. It was hard to see in the waning light, and soon darkness would envelop the beach. Most of the party goers had left, and other than a few gulls, the beach was empty. The waves crashed violently against the sand mimicking the thoughts tumbling around in my head. My heart hurt for the scared little boy that ran from his party, and I hoped that Aaron could see that he was better that she made him out to be. He was strong, and the fact that he overcame his tumultuous childhood was proof. I understood, now more than ever, what he meant about Brooklyn being him. Jason has never wanted anything to do with his son, but Aaron made a connection with him immediately just like Avery had done with him all those years ago.

Just as I was ready to give up, I saw him. His bright red wetsuit was a stark contrast to the black ocean. He was straddling his board out beyond the breakers, and I watched in awe as he paddled along, and pressed up just in time to catch a wave. He rode it until he fell off before turning around, and going back out.

I tucked my dress under myself as I sat in the soft sand just watching him. He needed this, and I didn’t want to interrupt whatever healing was taking place. He sliced through the water with precision, catching wave after wave. The sun sank below the horizon, and still he stayed.

Just as I was getting ready to go in and grab a jacket, he stopped. Instead of turning to paddle back out, he placed his board under his arm and began walking up the beach. It was dark now, and I really couldn’t make out his expression until he was right in front of me.

“What are you doing out here?” he tossed his board to the sand and sat down beside me. His chest was rising in soft pants as he attempted to catch his breath. Ocean water dripped from his hair, and he sighed as he bent his knees and rested his arms on top of them.

“I came for you,” I offered a tentative smile. I wasn’t sure what his state of mind was at the moment, and I wanted to offer support.

“Why?” he muttered. “I’m not good for anything.”

“That’s not true,” I placed my hand on his arm and he flinched at my touch. “This isn’t the Aaron I know. The Aaron I know is confident, and doesn’t let some loser of a parent tell him anything. He’s strong, and independent, and I love him.” I waited as he just sat there looking so defeated. “Don’t let that woman make you feel less worthy. She doesn’t define you, you do!” I shoved him lightly to get his attention.

“That woman is my mom,” he gritted out.

“That woman gave birth to you. That doesn’t make her your mom. Avery is your mom. She loves you, and raised you to be great. You’re a good guy, Aaron. I think so, and so do a lot of other people,” I nudged him, praying he’d lift his head and look at me.

I shivered as we sat there in the dark on the beach. Silence surrounded us, but for Aaron it seemed to be his savior. I watched as his past finally started to fall away, and the prospect of a future together grew. “You’re right,” he finally broke the silence between us. “Where’s Brooklyn?” It was as if he finally realized that I was alone.

“Emma’s watching him. She went back to your parents’ place when I came down here,” I scanned his face trying to figure out what he was thinking.

“Come with me,” he stood, grabbed his board, and then held out his hand to me.

I went without question in awe of his determination. He led me back to his parents’ house where he put away his board and slipped on a pair of flipflops. He pushed the top half of his wet suit down, and tugged on a t-shirt before venturing out onto the beach once again.

We walked in the opposite direction we’d been down the beach. I’d never gone this way. It was undeveloped, and dark. The sound of the waves crashing was all that was heard as he led me through the darkness. “Trust me, ok?” he glanced over at me.

I nodded as I leaned into his side. “When I was little I was walking down here one night. I used to do dumb stuff like wander off when my dad told me not to. I found this place by accident. No one other than my parents know about it in our family,” he pointed to a tree that was growing right near the water. The waves crashed underneath it as it clung to the sand. “If you get in just the right spot, the view is beautiful,” he waited for the water to recede before tugging me underneath the branches. When the water rushed back in, he quickly lifted me into his arms so I’d stay dry. “Sit right here,” he patted a branch that was bent like a seat. “Look,” he pointed out at the water, and I was awe. It was beautiful. The moon reflected like glass on the water. Fireflies were flashing along the shore. It was like a scene from a storybook. “I wanna bring Brooklyn here sometime. I wanna share my happy place with him,” he squeezed my knee, “and you.”

“Aaron,” I stuttered. I didn’t know how to put into words what I felt. I was confused, worried, and a whole lot of other emotions that I couldn’t quite explain.

“No,” he squeezed again. “I know it’s crazy right now. I know you have to finish school. I know I don’t have a real job, or a place for the three of us, but I know I love you. We’ll figure the rest out as we go. Just trust me,” he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me against him.

“I do,” I sighed as I leaned into his chest. It was the truth. I really did. I trusted him with my heart, and now I was going to trust him with my son’s.

Epilogue

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