Page 29 of Ethan's Command

Her teeth sank into her bottom lip as a fresh wave of guilt washed over her, making her chest feel like it was being squeezed in a vise. She hadn’t told Jackson the truth. If she had,he’d be here now, making the tough decisions and taking this burden off her shoulders. Maybe that was what she needed—someone else to take control. But no, she hadn’t done that, had she? She’d let Ethan back in, begged him to touch her, hold her. God, she didn’t know if she was angrier with him or herself.

Ethan was her kryptonite, the chink in her armor she couldn’t seem to guard against. Every smile, every fleeting touch from him ignited a fire inside her, a heat she couldn’t extinguish no matter how hard she tried. It was infuriating and foolish. How could she be so stupid?

And now… now, she’d slept with him again. What if he walked out like nothing had happened? Worse, what if he told her he couldn’t do this, that someone else would have to protect her and Liam? The thought sent a chill racing down her spine, but she shoved it aside. Regret wouldn’t solve anything.

Splashing cold water on her face, she let the icy sting ground her. She straightened, squaring her shoulders and breathing deeply. Enough was enough. It was time to face the music. She needed answers, and she wouldn’t let Ethan dodge her this time. He owed her honesty, and she wasn’t backing down until she got it.

CHAPTER 10

Ethan turnedon the shower and stood under the cold spray. He’d woken early with a massive headache. As much as he wanted to stay in Brooklyn’s bed, he knew he needed to get out of there. He’d called Rusty, who came immediately, and he headed home.

The shower felt good on his aching skull. The frigid temperature was brutal, but it usually worked to kill his headache if he got to it fast enough. This one was bad. He’d thought he was done with these monster headaches but obviously his body had other ideas.

It didn’t help that he’d had the dream again after he’d fallen asleep. The woman laughing and smiling. He couldn’t see her face, just a glimpse of her jawline. A quick flash of ink, or a birthmark. All too fast and disjointed to make heads or tails of. Always the scent of her perfume in his nose when he woke up. Stupid. He had spent an amazing night with Brooklyn, better than he’d ever imagined and yet the woman still appeared in his dreams to haunt him.

He needed to get his head examined. Brooklyn was everything he could ever want, and yet he found himself wanting to put distance between themjust in case. In case of what? Somefantasy coming to life? He snorted derisively, then sputtered as he inhaled some of the water.

The distance thing was probably not a bad idea though. Guilt washed over him. He should have said no to her. She was vulnerable, and he took advantage. She said yes, hell, she’d asked him, and was a willing participant, but he still couldn’t help but feel like the better choice would have been to say no. Sadly, he just wasn’t that strong. He would, however, make it up to her today. They needed to get on the same page, even if that meant not being near each other.

He turned off the water and stepped out, quickly toweling himself off. Last night had been fantastic, better than he’d ever imagined. That was a helluva hard thing to give up. He sighed. It had also seemed…odd. A few times he’d had déjà vu, like he’d slept with Brooklyn before. Like he knew the curve of her hip and the hollow beneath her jawline. How his fingers felt inside her. He shrugged and continued to dry off. Whatever was going on in his brain, he wasn’t going to dwell on it. It would just bring the headache back.

He quickly dressed in jeans and a white button-down. After rolling up his sleeves, he tucked his gun in his waistband at the small of his back. Moving toward the kitchen, he glanced at Mojo, who was conked out in his bed. The poor guy was totally done. Ethan couldn’t blame him. Mojo had been keeping watch for what seemed like days, never truly relaxing and now that he was home, Mojo was taking full advantage.

Ethan made an omelet, and when Mojo opened an eye, Ethan chopped some chicken breast for a snack for the pooch. Sitting at his breakfast bar, drinking his coffee, he looked around his condo. He hadn’t bought a house like some of his teammates. He was too used to being on the road. Why did he need a house? He just needed a place to lay his head when he was in town. That’s what his places had always been.

Now that the Big Island was his home base, he knew he could get a more permanent place. but he hadn’t thought it was necessary. Looking at the bare beige walls and generic furniture, he suddenly had a pang. Brooklyn had made her place a home. Somewhere to come and actually relax, enjoy time off. His place screamed only here for now. Except he wasn’t a bachelor on the go anymore. Maybe it was time to buy a place, like his teammates.

His cell rang and he answered. “Bellamy, how’s it going?”

“I’m calling to ask you the same question. Did last night’s conversations yield anything useful?”

“Not a damn thing.” Ethan let out a sigh. “I’m nowhere on this and out of leads.”

“Shit,” Bellamy grunted. “Did Nova have any ideas?”

Ethan snorted. “Other than the Yakuza angle, nothing actionable. None of it makes any sense.”

“Yeah, no shit.”

Ethan took a sip of coffee. “Brooklyn tried to convince me, or maybe herself, that it was all a mistake. Like whoever tried to grab Liam just made an error, and now they’ve realized their error, so the danger has passed.”

“And what do you think of that?” Bellamy asked his voice neutral.

“I think it’s fucking wishful thinking. Someone wants Liam for whatever unknown reason, and they’re just regrouping trying to come up with another way to get him.”

“That sounds about right. Bad actors rarely ever give up and go home.”

“Yeah. There’s no way we’d be that lucky.” Ethan’s headache rumbled alive a little bit and he squeezed his eyes shut against the encroaching pain. “I was thinking of driving by the corner where the incident happened. Maybe there are cameras that noone noticed. I’m grasping at straws, but straws are all I have left. I’m out of ideas.”

Bellamy sighed. “I hear that. Let me know if you find anything or need any help.”

“Will do.” Ethan broke off the call.

He started to put his phone down but then thought the better of it. He dialed Brooklyn. He wanted to explain why he wasn’t there when she woke up this morning, but the call went to voicemail. He glanced at his watch. She was probably already at work. He left her a quick message telling her that Rusty had been there to keep an eye on things this morning and that he’d be there once Liam got out of school.

That done, he got his wallet and keys and headed toward the door. Mojo lifted his head but Ethan told him to stay. The dog needed some downtime. Not too much because he’d get bored and into trouble, but he’d been on duty for a while now and deserved a little bit of R&R. Maybe a house would be a good idea. He could have a fenced backyard and a doggie door so Mojo could go out when he wanted. Okay, the fence would have to be eight feet and maybe two feet in the ground but it could work. Ethan grinned. Maybe no doggie door. Mojo was a terror when he was determined to get his way. Wasn’t everybody?

His headache finally abated; Ethan drove slowly past the corner where the attempt to snatch Liam had occurred. Nothing stood out to him. Nothing that said this was the best place to grab the kid. He pulled a U-turn and then parked. He sat in his truck and looked at the corner. It was a three-way stop. A small restaurant on one corner, a dry cleaner on the other and a t-shirt shop at the top of the street. There was a parking lot next to that where Brooklyn must have parked her car.