Page 50 of Stick Play

“But she wasn’t getting the followers she wanted, and everyone seemed more interested in me, and what I was doing, than her.” She goes quiet and puts her hands on my thighs and gives a little squeeze. “Wait, do you know about any of this?” The truth is, she might already know the horrid details. It’s not talked about by the guys or the WAGs, they all know the truth, but the media frenzy around it was crazy at the time and it still comes up in interviews, which is why Coach told me to keep my head down and on the straight and narrow.

“No, not at all. I rarely go on social media. I only ever do pictures and updates on my café page.”

She takes my hands. “I want to hear the truth from you.” Her faith in me astounds me, especially after everything she’s been through. I can’t even begin to describe how that makes me feel.

I lay my head back and lightly run my fingers over her stomach. “When Liza wasn’t getting the comments and attention she needed, and her fans made it more about me, she turned on me.”

Her hands tighten around mine. “What did she do?”

“She used her audience to spread lies about me. She said I was abusive, a drunk driver, and that I was banging multiple ‘young’ girls at once.” I hold her gaze, gauging her reaction. What I see is hurt and sorrow, not fear or belief. It prompts me to continue. “People love drama, Gina. God, they fucking love to get the dirt on people, especially people in the public eye, like hockey players. Those posts started getting her the attention she needed. At first, I didn’t even know she was saying horrible things about me. It was done behind my back. We were still seeing each other. It was Brighton who told me.”

“Brighton knew the truth.”

It’s a statement, not a question and it speaks volumes. Gina believes me, too. “Then the news channels started following me around, asking questions, and making me look pretty damn bad in the public’s eyes.”

“That must have been horrible, Ash. No one has said anything to me. I’m not sure I would have believed it anyway.”

“We don’t talk about it, and they all believe me, and take my side. If they didn’t, if someone in the group thought I did those horrible things, I’m sure they would have whispered warning words or something to you.”

“Maybe not.” She widens her legs and as I glance at her beautiful body, my cock twitches against her back. “No one knows what’s going on between us.”

“Right.” I resist the urge to ask exactly what is going on between us. Friends with benefits is one thing, but I’ve never spilled my guts to anyone outside my teammates before.

We remain quiet for a long time, just enjoying the quiet and each other’s company. I run my fingers over her body and soft moans escape her lips. “Ash, is this why I’ve not seen you out with anyone?”

“Yeah.” She turns sympathetic eyes on me, and falls silent, like she’s waiting for me to say more. “I’m not good with relationships. My relationship with Liza really opened my eyes to how I was living my life and who I was dating. It turns out everyone wanted something from me.”

“I was wondering what you meant when you told your dad he knew where you stood on relationships. I understand now, and I understand being scared to try again, because betrayal really hurts. But there could be a woman out there for you. I don’t think all women go after hockey players because they want something. Look at Melanie, Brighton, Josie, and Maeve. All amazing, strong women.”

I go quiet, and she leaves me with my thoughts for a moment. After a while, I explain, “I don’t know what I did to make my mom leave. Do you have those thoughts too?”

She turns in the tub and faces me. “I do, but after having a child of my own, I learned it was her, not me. I love Zoe with all my heart and keeping her safe, protected and loved is the most important thing in my life. Nothing would ever make me leave her. Mom had problems. I guess yours did too.” Her hands cup my face. “You can’t blame yourself, Ash. Honestly, I can’t understand how Lucian didn’t want anything to do with Zoe. He had two kids, sure. But to simply discard the third one, it's cruel.”

“It is cruel.” Maybe she’s right about all this. Maybe it had more to do about my mother than it had to do with me. “I had Dad,” I murmur, and even to my own ears, I can hear the love and fondness in my voice.

“You’re a great man, Ash.”

My heart swells as a new kind of lightness comes over me. “He did good, huh?”

“He did good. You did good too.”

I splash the water. “Jesus, now I’m going to have to give him the family he wants.”

“No, you can’t have a family to please your dad.” She pokes my chest. “You have a family because it’s what you want.”

Is that what I want? Do I want a family of my own? Am I too much of a chicken shit to open myself up again?

She turns back around, picks up her wine and lays against me. A soft sigh escapes her lips. “Gina.”

“Hmm.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“Meaning?”

“You said you understand being scared because betrayal really hurts. What about you? You seem to be in the same position.”

“It’s different for me. I have a child. I have to be careful she doesn’t get attached and then discarded.” I digest her words, and for some reason they gut me a little. “Also, I’m a ready-made family, and finding a guy who wants that…won’t be so easy.” A small laugh that holds no humor escapes her throat. “I mean, who wants to hang out with someone who does old lady mother things,” she adds, calling on Callie’s cruel words.

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