Page 30 of Stick Move

“First you didn’t break your toe, and I’m not laughing at you.” I’m pretty sure she just said ‘much’ under her breath.

“You don’t know if my toe is broken,” I shoot back. What the hell is she doing. “Stay away from the bed.”

Ignoring me, she lifts the pillow. The spider takes two steps toward me, and stops dead—except it’s not dead. Nope, not dead at all. The bastard is alive and well and staring me down like were at center ice and this is a fucking face off. Goddammit. If only I had my hockey stick. Then I’d show the motherfucker who is boss. Maybe.

“Don’t move,” Brighton orders.

Like a ventriloquist, I don’t move my lips when I answer. “I’m not fucking moving.”

Everything in the way she looks at me suggests I’m the dummy, not the puppet master. Her body shakes from laughter as she hurries to the ensuite bathroom and comes back with a tissue.

She holds her hand up, palm out, like she might be talking to one of the children she used to babysit. “Just stay where you are. I’ll take care of it.”

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“I’m going to pick it up and put it outside.”

I give a slow shake of my head. I don’t want any sudden movements sending that asshole my way. “Don’t go near it.”

“Noah, I got this.”

“Kill it.”

“I don’t need to kill it, and for the record, not everyone hates spiders. We’re surrounded by foliage here at the resort and these guys help with the insects. They’re our friends, Noah.”

“They’re no friend of mine.”

I stand back as she throws the tissue over the gigantic spider, gathers it up in her hands and walks to the window. “Can you open this for me?”

“No.”

She bites her lip. “I’ll stand over here with this asshole.” Okay, now she’s just blatantly making fun of me. I stare at her as she backs up, putting herself in the corner and giving me a wide berth.

“Fine.”

I cautiously walk to the window and crank it open, never taking my eyes off the tissue in her hand. As soon as she starts toward me, I go back to the bed and give it a once over, checking for more spiders.

“There you go, cutie,” she murmurs, talking to it in a cooing voice, and now I’m suddenly jealous of a damn hairy asshole.

I shake my head. “Cutie? Seriously? Why don’t you run off and have little hairy baby assholes together?” Yeah, okay, I know. I’m the only asshole in the room now.

“Ohmigod, Noah.” I turn back as she closes the window. “What would you have done if I wasn’t here?” She’s still biting her damn bottom lip, and while that is sexy, it’s because she’s trying hard not to laugh at me.

I throw my arms out, mimicking a big explosion. “Grab Camryn and burn the place down.” This time she can no longer hold it in. She bends over as a huge laugh erupts from her throat and I fold my arms and glare at her. “I’m so happy I’m here for your amusement.”

She steps up to the bed, pulls the sheets back and gives it a check. “All clear.”

“It’s not that I’m afraid,” I begin, back peddling as I try to recoup some self-respect. It’s true. My voice did get a little high. “It’s…they can bite.”

She blinks rapidly and nods. “Oh, yes, and the bites are quite painful.”

I eye her as we both stand in my room completely naked, like we do that around each other all the time. We don’t, of course, and it’s odd, but we’re both completely comfortable, and I like it far too much. “Are you still making fun of me?”

“No,” she practically shrieks. “I agree. A bite can be painful. I take it you’ve been bitten.”

I fold my arms again and her gaze moves down my body. “Well, no. I just…”

“I don’t like chickpeas.”

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