Page 7 of Shattered Dreams

He picks up the picture and studies it, his shoulders slumping. He and Max were good friends. They had a closerrelationship than Max and I ever had, and probably ever would have had had he lived.

“Yes, I love her, but that doesn’t mean she’s going to still feel the same way about me when she’s finally done finding herself, or whatever the fuck she needs to do. It’s not fair you ask me to wait around. I’m older than you by some change, and it’s my right to do what I want. That means meeting a woman, and if she’s a good fit, starting a family.”

The idea sends a shiver down my spine. Starting a family with someone other than Zarah. She could already be carrying my baby, and the day she told me she didn’t want to see me anymore was the day she took away my choices. She’ll do what she wants if I made her pregnant, and I doubt she’ll tell me anything.

“Okay.”

It aggravates me that’s all he has to say to my venting, but I guess there’s nothing more hecansay. Everything I said, he agrees with.

“Now, it would be great if you left me alone. I’ll check into Ingrid’s death and I’ll email you if I find anything, but I don’t think it’s too much to ask if you and Stella mind your own business.”

Zane stands and carefully sets his mug on the table. “I’m sorry I came by. You know, maybe I wasn’t right. I’ve never seen Zarah happier than when she was with you.”

I rub my hands tiredly over my face and ignore the pinpricks of tears behind my eyelids. Maybe I can go back to bed after Zane leaves. “I thought I made her happy too, but I wasn’t enough and it’s not hard to see why. The redhead is more my speed, and it’s no good pretending she’s not. There’s a reason rich girls don’t marry poor boys.”

I borrow the line from my favorite movie. I never did understand Jay Gatsby, trying so hard to strike it rich for awoman, and in the end, he realized what a shallow creature Daisy Buchanan really was. Just like what Stella was trying to tell Max.

I know Zarah’s not like that anymore. How could she be? Her experiences under Ash’s control and what they did to her in Quiet Meadows changed her, but she’ll always have that history. She’ll never know what it’s like to have to work for what you need.

“It’s not about the money.”

I laugh. “That’s easy to say if you have it. Congratulations, really. Stella’s a good person. Remember where she came from. She’ll always be different from you.”

“Better, you mean. I got it, and yeah, I already know. Take it easy, Davenport.”

“You do the same.”

Zane steps out the door, and Baby gazes longingly after him. I pull on my jacket and stuff my feet into my boots and let her out. It snowed another couple of inches, and the rising sun is glimmering in the sky. Zane’s tire tracks run down the parking lot marring the freshly fallen snow, but his vehicle is already gone.

It hurts a little I won’t be at Zane and Stella’s ceremony tonight. I was actually looking forward to listening to their vows, holding Zarah’s hand and spinning dreams of our future, too. Seems downright stupid now, having only just met her a few short months ago.

I let my romantic side out and it broke my heart. I should have known better.

In the strip mall’s parking lot, I park my truck next to Pop’s car, and his look is guarded when I step inside our office. He’s always afraid he’s going to hurt me more somehow, but I can’t tell him that’s damn near impossible.

“Mornin’,” he says, stapling papers together. “I brought breakfast.”

“Thanks. We have a new job.”

Pop’s not dumb. “Stella wants us to look into Ingrid Flannigan’s death.”

“Zane, but yeah. I haven’t sent back the difference from what Stella paid me, so I figured why not. Though, I don’t know what he expects us to find. It’s a little spooky, but I just don’t see it going anywhere.”

“Do you think she was involved with Quiet Meadows?”

I take off my jacket. “I don’t know. It’s a good enough place to start. Seems like women associated with that hellhole are dropping like flies.”

“Is Zarah gonna be okay?” Pop whispers her name like he’s saying a prayer. Either to keep from hurting my feelings or out of a sincere worry for her. He liked her, and I know he wouldn’t have minded in the least had she and I gotten hitched.

It chills me to the bone Zarah could end up hurt through all this, but I can’t live their lives and I tell Pop that. “Zane knows what’s going on. I’ve told him all my suspicions and that they were using Quiet Meadows as a testing site for...something. He knows about the dead girls. If all his gazillions can’t keep Zarah safe, I’m not going to be of much use. Besides, we never did find out anything about my truck. Could be us spending time together would have been just as dangerous as her being alone. He’ll do what he needs to do to protect her.”

“When do you want to check it out?”

“Better sooner than later. I told him we aren’t going to find anything, but he insisted. He’s going to be MIA for the nextcouple of days—he and Stella are getting married this evening at the courthouse then they’re dropping off the grid.”

“What’s Zarah going to do?”

I pull a breakfast sandwich out of the fast food bag and tear it in half, trying to keep the crumbs to a minimum. We don’t have a cleaning lady come in here. “Before she dumped me, she mentioned something about staying at my place, but Stella said she has a trip to LA planned at some point. I don’t know when she leaves, but could be she’s flying out there to give Zane and Stella some time alone. Maybe she’ll meet a movie star.”

---