Page 97 of It's a Date (Again)

I nod several times, grinning like the Cheshire cat, but instead of falling down the rabbit hole, I’m finally climbing out of it. I can’t believe how long it took me to see what was right in front of me. Tears burst from my eyes all at once, as though my heart is pumping them right out of my body. They stream down my face, but I don’t wipe them away.

“Then what are you waiting for? Go. Go tell him.”

“Okay, okay. I’m going to tell him. Thank you, Hank.” I wrap my arms around him.

Hank hugs me back. “Thank you, Peyton.”

We break our embrace and share a smile.

“All right, go.” He pats me on the shoulder.

I turn from him, and the muscles in my legs explode as I take off in a full sprint. My lungs suck in the cold night air, and my heart bangs inside my chest.

“Don’t get hit by a car this time!” Hank yells out with a chuckle. His words echo through the streets of Chicago.

I laugh and cry as I run, a melding of emotions reserved only for when the heart gets to speak for itself. My shoes pound against the pavement, each step carrying me a little closer to where I should have been all along. At the intersection, the signal changes toDONOTWALK. Remembering what happened last time and determined to not end up being Tyler’s girlfriend again, I stop and wait for it to change. Traffic whooshes by as I catch my breath. I slide my phone from my purse and quickly send a text to Maya, telling her who I love, just to be safe.

She immediately replies with,I know.

I smile and stow my phone away. The light changes, and I take off again, faster this time. I’m scared I’ll be too late, that he’ll have moved on or had a change of heart after I broke his.

I throw open the doors to the building and rush to the elevator. My fingers hit theUPbutton repeatedly, but it doesn’t move. I can see it’s stuck on one of the higher floors. A sign beside a closed door that saysSTAIRWELLcatches my attention. I suck in air and bolt through it, taking the stairs two at a time. I’m beyond exhausted, but I won’t stop until he’s standing right in front of me, hearing my heart finally tell him the truth.

My knuckles rap against his door, fast and furious. Maybe he’s not home. But I don’t care, I keep knocking anyway.

Finally, the door swings open, and there he is standing before me with a look of bewilderment. He’s crystal clear and completely in focus. But all around him is a blur, like Monet himself painted his world. I’ve stared into those blue eyes a million times, and somehow, I didn’t see what was right in front of me. The love of my life, and the reason all the other ones didn’t work out. It’s because they weren’t him. They weren’t Robbie.

“Peyton,” he says. His face is full of concern, and I realize I probably look like a madwoman. I ran nearly a mile to get here, crying and laughing the whole way.

“I remember,” I say.

“You remember what?”

“You. You told me you loved me. I remember.”

His cheeks flush, and he lowers his head like he’s embarrassed or something. “Yeah, then you also remember you said you didn’t love me back, that we were just friends.” When he picks his head up, I can see the pain in his eyes, and I feel so bad for ever hurting him to begin with. They’re glassy, just like they were the night of my accident—the night I lied to him.

“I know. But it wasn’t true.”

He sighs and shakes his head. A tear falls from the corner of his eye, and I step toward him, wanting to put it back. I don’t want to be the reason for it. Robbie holds his hands up, halting me. “Peyton, no. You’re just confused. I’m telling you. You don’t love me. You made it very clear that night. You said it more than once.”

“But you were the one I was running to when I got hit by the car, Robbie.”

He shakes his head again. “No.”

“Yes.” I nod, taking another step forward. He drops his hands, but I can tell he still doesn’t believe me. I don’t blame him, though, given how much I hurt him when I lied.

“I remember. It was you, Robbie. It was always you. And I was too scared to love you because I didn’t want to lose you. I’m not scared anymore. I’d rather love you for a minute than love anyone else for a lifetime.”

He stares back at me. Unblinking, his eyes search mine as though he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop, for me to take it all back. But I won’t. My heart belongs to Robbie whether he accepts it or not. Even if right now he says it’s too late, and my heart breaks in two, half of it will always be his.

“I love you, Robbie. I’ve loved you since the night we made that pact back in college, and I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to realize it.” My bottom lip trembles, and tears spill out. He doesn’t say anything.He just stares. I’m not even sure he’s hearing what I’m saying, or if he even cares to hear it. I think I might be too late. How could I have not known? These past two weeks, I’ve felt such a closeness to Robbie, an undeniable connection. Waking up next to him was like watching the sunrise, and falling asleep beside him was like falling into a dream. I never needed my memories to love him—I only needed them to remember I did.

Robbie’s hand slips into the pocket of his joggers. I don’t know what else to say to make him believe me. And I don’t know if he ever will. But he has to. I’ve wasted too much time already. He pulls his hand from his pocket, holding it out in a fist, palm up. Does he want me to bump it? Play rock, paper, scissors? Kiss it? I’m not sure what to do or what to say.

He slowly unclenches his fist, revealing a penny. It lies in the center of his palm, tails face up.

Robbie cracks a grin, and I realize what he wants. I flip the coin over in his hand and smile back at him.