Page 89 of It's a Date (Again)

“What did you order?” I ask.

Nash takes a seat across from me and unfolds a napkin in his lap. “It’s a surprise.”

I hope it’s better than my last surprise, and by that I mean the party where not one but two guys broke it off with me.

“I’m glad I could finally take you out on a date at night,” he adds.

“Me too.” I sip water, while my eyes wander to the other couples seated at their tables. They’re engaged in conversations, staring intently at one another, laughing, and eating, like nothing else around them matters.

I think that’s what love is supposed to look like. Your person completely in focus while the world melts around you. My gaze swings to Nash. Everything around him is as clear as he is.

“Nash,” I say.

“Yeah.”

“Are you upset that I haven’t made a decision yet?”

His brow creases. “No, why would I be?”

I readjust the napkin in my lap. “Do you feel like I should have just known who I loved?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, did you think our connection was so strong that it had to be you?”

He tilts his head to the side. “I knew I felt strongly about you, but I didn’t know if you felt the same way. I mean ... I hoped you did.”

I search his face like I’m trying to find an answer to a question I already know the answer to.

It couldn’t have been Nash. Even now, he’s not entirely sure how I feel about him, and I don’t know either. There’s no way I was running toward him the night of the accident, and I think I’ve known that since our first date. I chalked it up to him being shy or nervous, but really our connection just isn’t strong.

His face changes, almost turning downward as if he knows what I’m thinking, knows he’s not the one. Tyler felt so deeply about us that it hurt him that I couldn’t feel it too. But I could. I knew the stronger connection was with Tyler, but for some reason I couldn’t say it out loud. I couldn’t end it with Nash and Shawn and commit to him. I don’t know why, but it has to be Tyler. He was the one I was running to.

“I’m sorry, Nash.”

He pulls his lips in and nods like he already knows what I’m going to say.

“You’re an amazing man, truly, one of the good ones. You deserve someone that’s going to love you with every ounce of their being.” My voice cracks. “But you weren’t the guy I was running to the night of my accident, and I’m really sorry it’s taken me this long to figure it out.”

Nash leans across the table and rests his hand on mine. “It’s all right, Peyton. There’s nothing to be sorry about.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Not at all. My mom might be when she finds out I’m not bringing a girl home for Christmas again.” He chuckles. “I may have been a little presumptuous and told her about you.” His cheeks flush. “If you’re free, maybe you can pretend to be my girlfriend.”

I smile. “I think I’ve got enough tropes in my dating life for this year.”

“Next year then.”

We laugh, and he squeezes my hand gently before pulling away.

“What are you waiting for?”

I give him a quizzical look.

“You should go. Go tell him how you feel.”

“Are you sure?”