The rest of the shifters were looking at me like they might just be a little afraid.
You couldn’t win them all.
Chapter 21
Ihad learned from Fox that the man Rally had fought’s name was Tommy. He was alive, which Fox and I both thought was kind of a bummer. Fox didn’t say so out loud but it’s what I had gotten from his facial expression, or lack thereof.
Tommy’s buddies dragged his body off into the woods by his legs. It didn’t look very comfortable but since I didn’t really give a shit about him I kept my mouth shut and just watched it all happen.
Fox, who was turning into quite the fountain of useful information, also told me they’d dragged him into the woods because they were going to try to get him to shift so that he could heal his injuries.
I wanted to follow them into the woods so that I could watch the shift happen. I wanted to see it for myself so badly. Perhaps when Rally was done being mad at me I could convince him to shift in front of me so I could see it happen.
Then again, perhaps it would be wise not to ask something like that because I didn’t want him to take it the wrong way. I didn’t want to make anyone feel like a sideshow freak at the circus.
A lot of the shifters left after that but some of them stayed. More than I thought would have stayed. They were huddled around in groups talking.
Someone had lit a very large bonfire in the middle of the clearing and people stood all around it.
There were a few grills up close behind the farmhouse. They’d been turned on and there were a couple of men cooking various different kinds of meat on them. I was happy to see the grills and not that weird food truck from the underground, because that shit had been creepy.
I hadn’t eaten much today but I wasn’t hungry enough to hang around the grills waiting for someone to hand me something to eat. I had been nervous earlier and I never could eat when I felt nervous or uncomfortable. The food always sat like a lead weight in my stomach and the urge to vomit was always background noise inside my brain.
Rally’s guards had practically herded him inside the house as soon as Tommy had been dragged into the woods. He didn't stick around to mingle and no one seemed to have a problem with that.
Hunter stayed outside with Ginger and the baby. They were in a small group of people, talking. Ginger was even laughing a little. It was good to see that not all of these people were assholes to her. And, thankfully, there were no creeps leering at her because she was one of the few single ladies here.
Nobody talked to me but everyone sure did stare. That was okay, I wasn’t there to make friends. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt my feelings just a little bit because it certainly did.
I kept the friendly but bland smile on my face as I made my way up to the house.
I was hesitant to walk inside and wondered if I should get in my car and leave. Rally hadn’t seemed very pleased with meand it hadn’t been like I’d been invited inside with him and his guards.
That didn’t hurt my feelings either. I didn’t even really know the man, that would come with time if we were to remain friends. But I didn’t really like being ignored or left behind.
If he really thought I was his mate then shouldn’t I be inside the house with him? Shouldn’t I have at least been invited inside?
I didn’t bother with knocking, they’d hear me coming anyways. So, I just let myself in. If they didn’t want me in the house they could have stopped me before I‘d even asked up the dilapidated steps on the front porch. No one tried to stop me.
They were all standing around in the kitchen with Rally holding a bag of ice to his face. The space was really too small for all of them to be crammed into and a lot of the guards stood shoulder to shoulder with their backs against a wall with no windows.
“I thought you would have left immediately after,” Rally murmured in a bitter, angry voice.
Why he was so angry with me I had no idea. I’d come here to support him just like he’d want me to and I’d done nothing but take his back since I’d gotten here.
What the hell else could he have wanted from me?
That was something I never understood about people and likely never would. Who you wanted something so badly until you actually got it and then you didn’t want it anymore because the reality never lived up to the fantasy you had created in your mind.
I thought that perhaps this was what Rally was now experiencing with me. And the whole thing made me unexpectedly sad for some insane reason.
I pursed my lips to keep myself from snarling like a cornered animal with rabies. “Would you like for me to leave now?” Iasked him and I feared some of my not so nice feelings had leaked into my voice, making my words come out sounding hostile, challenging even.
He pulled the ice away from his face and frowned deeply at me. “Why would I ever want you to leave? You’re my fucking mate. I know you don’t exactly understand what that means for either of us, but, for me, it means there will never be a time where I don’t want you to be around me.”
It was my turn to frown. He was correct, I did not understand everything it meant when he called me his mate but I was far too uncomfortable with the whole thing to ask him for the intimate details on the matter.
“Aren’t you mad at me for what I said to you while you were fighting, about killing him? I get it. I’m ruthless and I can be quite heartless at times but I will not apologize to you or anyone else for that. Everything I’ve lived through in my life has taught me to be this way and it’s what’s kept me alive. If you want to remain in my life it’s something you’re going to have to come to terms with because I’m not going to be changing how I am any time soon. I can’t help that and I can’t, or won’t, change that. I want to apologize but I don’t think I’m capable of doing that now either, not for this.”